The Spotlight

trend watch

2010-10-12T07:43:00.000-07:00

see if you can spot the trend in these stories:

Man Punches Bus Driver for Staring at His Wife

Waterloo Teen Taken into Custody for Stabbing

Man Killed One Woman, Wounded Another, Before Shooting Self

survey says....?

if you said 'violence is primarily perpetrated by men', you would be right!!!

ugh. i want to move to iceland.

you take the good, you take the bad...the facts of life?

2010-09-30T13:29:00.000-07:00

the good: Girlafesto! the coolest thing i've seen in a LONG time. i'm going to print it out for my nieces' bedroom walls!

the bad: the reality of life for women and girls. this particular story is from iraqi kurdistan, and is actually really beautiful and inspirational- but it only highlights the DAILY fight for equality women face, everywhere. (via the awesome thefbomb.org )

the facts of life: violence against women harms men too, and men have a vitally important role to play in ending it. A Brother's Story is a great insight into the perspective of one man fighting against intimate partner violence. (via http://www.vday.org/)

FAIL

2010-09-16T12:27:00.000-07:00

who can find the common denominator in these three stories, (other than the awesome reporting & commentary by the women at Ms. Magazine Blog)?

Feds Lied in Tribal Rape Case

U.S. Has "Failed" Rape Victims: Senate to Hear Testimony

A Call for Self-Defense Against Victim-Blaming AND Against Rape

here are the common themes i see:

1. Rape is the lowest priority violent crime...
2. ...because really, it's the woman's own fault...and it's just a "women's issue" anyway...
3. ...so why bother spending any actual resources (time, money, attention) addressing it?

rape culture says that 'it's all in our heads'...that most rape is perpetrated by terrifying strangers in alleys (not true), that most women 'cry rape' falsely (not true) just because they regret a sexual encounter or because they want to get back at a man with whom they are upset, and that it's our responsibility as the VICTIMS of violence to somehow ward off that violence before it begins...otherwise, well, what did we expect?

I expect law enforcement to take my report of a violent attack on my person seriously. I expect that if i submit to an often painful, embarassing and psychologically difficult physical exam so that evidence of my rape can be collected, that said evidence will actually be TESTED. I also expect that women of all races and ethnicities and orientations and classes will be protected under the
LAWS of the united states. Frankly, I expect a life free from fear of rape and sexual assault.

i know, i have very high expectations.

ya think?

2010-09-11T13:02:00.000-07:00

"What is so piquant here is not the fact that Hillary understands that Obama is president. It is the growing sense that Hillary would have made a much, much better president than Obama."

(via Shakesville)

smart girls are scary, cont.

2010-08-25T06:28:00.000-07:00

as school started over the last few days, i've heard a lot of complaining from students about having to go back, leaving carefree summers behind, and especially, new school uniform codes (shudder). all relatively normal, understandable, even expected complaints from american kids.

the gratitude we should all feel for the fact that our students can attend school free (generally) from fear or danger is easily forgotten.

40 afghan school girls were apparently poisoned in a gas attack as they sat in school this week.

and previously in may.

and april.

and last year.

always girls schools.

but they keep going to school, believing fervently in the value of education, their right to knowledge.

they are braver than i will ever be.

no words

2010-08-24T21:04:00.000-07:00

(trigger warning for stories about rape)

afghanistan.

democratic

republic of

congo .

iowa.

dreams...

2010-08-19T18:59:00.000-07:00

the tagline of the Iowa Women's Foundation is "investing in the dreams of girls and the power of women".

MY dream is to work for a women's foundation someday, and be able to match my personal passion for feminism to my professional avocation- philanthropy and grant making. below is a really cool video chronicling the women's funding movement. of course money isn't EVERYTHING, but it's a key factor in driving systemic change, and we're only just now starting to really pick up steam. the need, and the potential, is staggering.

we need to keep putting our money where our mouth is. it sounds really simple, but intentionally prioritizing our giving to focus on women is very important, and often overlooked.

i love the statement at the end of the video- make history. fund boldly.

give to women!

must see tv.

2010-08-17T19:55:00.000-07:00

clear your schedules for at least 30 minutes.

if you haven't already seen rachel maddow's 'fake president's address' re: the gulf oil spill...even though it's 'capped' now... you'll be glad you spent 10:33 watching her seriously genius commentary.

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

and, as usual, keith olbermann hits it out of the park with his special comment on the so-called 'ground zero mosque'. so right on.

salam

2010-08-16T16:30:00.000-07:00

this.is.so.right.ON.

1. The mosque isn’t just a mosque — it’s a cultural center which contains a prayer room, classrooms, a gym, a pool, a 9/11 memorial, a restaurant, galleries, and an auditorium. So it’s actually more like a YMCA — or, as its name would indicate, a community center — and will be open to all stripes of people. And isn’t at the Ground Zero site. It’s two blocks from the World Trade Center.
2. You know what else is in a two-block radius of Ground Zero (“Ground Zero,” by the way, being a term I loathe)? The same stuff that is on any given two-block radius in New York City. A sex shop. A few bars. Two strip clubs. A bunch of bodegas. Oh and there’s also a mosque already in lower Manhattan. That mosque has been there for a while and the world has not ended. So what’s the cut-off? Two blocks isn’t ok, but three is?
3. “People who were killed on 9/11″ and “Muslims” are not mutually exclusive groups. Yes, Muslims worked in the towers, and for the fire department, and for the police, and for emergency services. Yes, Muslims lived and worked (and still live and work) in lower Manhattan. “Muslims vs. People Impacted by 9/11″ doesn’t really work when those two categories overlap.

Keep reading this perfect explanation of the NON-ISSUE that is (should be) the Islamic cultural center at the world trade center site, via Jill @ Feministe.

dude, you're hilarious.

2010-08-15T20:33:00.000-07:00

actual dude's facebook status seen today:

"Call 911, I was just raped at Mastercuts in [the mall], 3 kids haircuts $55, and then she wanted a tip. Tip is your way Overpriced. wont happen again."

we may have the trifecta, folks. 1. oblivious yet overt misogyny in the classic form of a completely inappropriate and offensive rape joke, 2. classist disregard for service worker earning a living wage (who, of course, happens to be a woman), and 3. no regard for grammar or syntax.

and the icing on the cake... he's available.

i know...try to control yourselves, ladies. don't hurt yourselves in the rush to nab this eligible stud.

Women Unbound! Finale

2010-08-12T19:23:00.000-07:00

i just finished the second and final book i committed to read for the Women Unbound! Challenge!

i joined the challenge at the Philogynist level: "read at least two books, including at least one nonfiction one." and i did it! i've never done a blog reading challenge, so i'm pretty excited to complete my first one successfully! :)

here's my review of The Dance of the Dissident Daughter by Sue Monk Kidd.

my sister (Eli at Need More Shelves!) told me to read this book years ago; i'm not really sure why it took me so long. i've never read The Secret Life of Bees, or any of S.M.K's other work, but i guess i should have known how well-written it would be. i don't know why that surprised me so much, but wow. this woman sure can paint a picture. i often have trouble getting psyched up to read non-fiction. i buy the book thinking 'oh, that sounds fascinating!' with great intentions of diving right in and expanding my mental acuity...and then i pick up a novel and never get back around to reading the non-fiction. it's a bad habit, i know. but from the minute i opened up this book i was right there with the author, word by word, minute by minute, wanting to find out what she said, thought and discovered next.

another surprise to me was the context of this book. sue monk kidd used to be an evangelical christian women's author. !! she was (in her words) a "good daughter" of the church. this book is the testimony of her transformation, transfiguration, reconstruction, her journey.

her story is funny, sad, scary and inspiring. it's the story of a feminist awakening. i got chills when i read the section, which was one of the turning points for the author, where she came upon her daughter being heckled by two men. she described feeling rage, indignation and an unwillingness for her daughter, any daughter, to experience a lifetime of subordination and patriarchal repression.

this is also a story about a religious awakening. the author's exploration of ancient religious traditions focusing on feminine symbols of divinity is fascinating- i ate it right up. couldn't get enough. it's just so...validating...to read the truth about the origins of modern religion and why/how the female-centered traditions were suppressed. validating to know that all those misgivings i've had aren't crazy. validating to know that there really are other women out there who question the 'our father's and 'in his image's we've heard for so long.

i can't even begin to do this book justice here. suffice it to say, S.M.K. describes a journey from complacency to the Sacred Feminine that isn't yet finished. her experience is not presented as a prescription, but rather as an example of one woman's experience, which is refreshing and inspiring. i don't necessarily agree with every final conclusion or choice of the author's, but that's ok. i DO feel a real connection and empathy with her journey, and an appreciation for the path she is blazing with courage.

i'm definitely a fan. there were some parts of this story that were, for me, a little bit hippy-dippy (i'm just too cynical, even when try not to be)...but generally speaking, there was something on just about every single page that resonated deeply with me.

do yourself a favor: read this book. especially if you grew up in the church and consider yourself in any way a feminist. you'll be glad you did. i sure am!

couldn't have said it better myself.

2010-08-11T07:20:00.000-07:00

From Feminsite:

I'm pretty sure I just hate cleaning toilets on my own, without any guidance
from Gloria Steinem on the subject.

LOL.

but yes, ahem, the evil feminists totally brainwashed the happy little housewives.

phylis.

2010-07-30T12:07:00.000-07:00

via the awesome Fannie's Room:

You know, when I was a kid, I always thought we'd be driving flying cars, riding hoverboards, and eating astronaut food in the year 2010. Instead, we have Phylis Schlafly, still partying like it's 1959.

someone needs to tell Phylis about Cristina Fernández de Kirchner, Jóhanna Sigurðardóttir, Angela Merkel, Benazir Bhutto, Margaret Thatcher, Golda Meïr, and Indira Gandhi...seriously.

seriously.

the f-word

2010-07-20T12:37:00.001-07:00

there are so many f-words, aren't there? i wonder what it is about the sixth letter of the english alphabet anyway? i digress.

today, i'm floored by this blog entry on The Fbomb (which, incidentally, is SO great- teenage feminists!!) about being the FAT girl. it's so true, so honest, and so maddening.

I still knew 99% of the kids in my class – probably my school – were looking at me and seeing “the fat girl.” Not Danielle. Not me.

ugh. this hits me like a punch in the gut, seriously. why can't we, HUMAN BEINGS, just treat each other with respect? with dignity?

fat politics/fat feminism makes me passionate, because how can women ever really achieve true equitable standing in society when something as basic as their physical size, weight and appearance counts them out from the get-go?? are only conventionally "beautiful", thin, white women ever going to achieve equality?

that is simply unacceptable to me.

what is going ON?

2010-06-10T08:55:00.000-07:00

haven't had much time to post lately, but i just have to say: W.T.H. IS GOING ON??

(trigger warning)
how many of these rape/incest/imprisonment stories to we have to keep hearing?

seriously.

the next time i hear someone say that women have achieved equality, or that rape culture is a myth...i might just flip right out on their willfully ignorant a**.

i can't say it better than my favorite spinster aunt:
"...a world order predicated on domination'n'submission oppresses entire classes of people. That oppression is experienced by these classes of people as discrimination, violence and hatred. That discrimination, violence and hatred are unhealthy and injurious."

which classes of people, one might ask? female people, brown people, differently-abled people, young people, old people, gay people, mentally-challenged people, poor people, and generally, anyone non-male, non-white, non-rich and non-NORM.

i hate the norm. viva la diferencia.

but i digress. those stories above hail from brazil, germany, and the US.
guess what... i'd put money on similar situations happening right now in dozens of other countries all over the world. because women are treated like property. it's really that simple. the worldwide oppression of women pervades all cultures, all religions, all national boundaries.

wake up, people. the war is far from over. as long as girls are being kidnapped, held against their will, raped by their fathers and forced to bear their children... we sure as h-e-double-hockey-sticks aren't equal.

still raging, still hoping

2010-04-27T09:10:00.000-07:00

april sucks. it's my busiest month at work, so of course that means it flies by too quickly, resulting in me falling frustratingly behind, working late/odd hours, and feeling altogether frenzied for 30 days or so.

thus- no posts recently.

however! today was just too overwhelming, too whiplash-inducing to pass without comment. see exhibits A through F, below:

Exhibit A
after reading this exposition (warning- explicit language, and possible trigger warning) on Feminism for Young Dudes, twice, i've decided my reaction is more positive than negative. i get the ironic tone, and the exagerrated obviousnesss...i even smirked a couple of times ("What I would like is for you to stop thinking about women with an 18th-century disposition while you chill on your ipad in the future."). i think the author's intent is great, which is: feminism doesn't suck! it's actually good for everyone, not just "hairy-legged broads" (represent!). and any time a member of "the superstructure of male, white corporate oppression" speaks up for the oppressed (in this case, teh ladeez. but see also Tim Wise. ), their voice is amplified and enjoys a wider audience purely by virtue of their membership in the aforementioned oppression superstructure. we need all the allies, especially those with privilege, we can get to join the efforts to speak out against white, male, (hetero, able-bodied, etc.etc.etc.) privilege and equalize that good ol' "Liberty and Justice for All" stuff.

i especially liked the part about the way men (and women!) self-righteously throw around the words 'whore' and 'slut' to describe women who engage in consensual sex at similar rates to men...and how someday, maude-willing, those words will be as taboo and offensive and inappropriate as the n-word is- and for all the same reasons.

but i just can't shut that little voice in the back of my head up. the one that says, "why, oh why, in the year two thousand freakin' ten, do we still need to be having this conversation? why are 'young dudes' still in need of CONVINCING that their female friends, companions, sisters, lovers, are worthy of equal treatment and equal respect? why the h-e-double hockey sticks can't this message, which women (awesome women, like Jessica, and Fannie, and Pam, and Melissa, and Twisty!) are constantly repeating, be accepted as fact, instead of some sort of debatable theory?

so thanks for trying, Matt...i'm just annoyed that you have to try so hard.

-----

Exhibits B & C
then, after i processed all of that tasty internalized rage, i stumbled upon two perfect examples of Caution: Occupying space on planet earth While Female.

(Trigger Warnings for rape and violence)

this 12-year old girl, and this 13-year-old girl absolutely did not deserve the brutality they experienced at the hands of men.

incidentally, no headlines today about men being repeatedly and intentionally brutalized by women.

------

Exhibit D
then of course, a tuesday *headdesk*moment (they really do happen every day) re: boobquake. nice try re-claiming your bodies, grrlz...lucky for you, all the attention is still being paid exclusively to your chestular area, not your, you know...ideas & stuff. (this is what happens when we try to re-claim or re-define partiarchal ideas while operating within the partiarchal system. i'm not saying we shouldn't do it- i'm just saying, by and large, it doesn't work.)

----

Exhibits E & F
and then! a light shone upon me, and my plummeting morale was once again turned upward when i read the words of these two thoughtful, accomplished, intelligent women, discussing delightfully similar concepts (namely: the intersection of us all, and our human responsibility to each other- to care for and embrace, rather than to belittle and destroy):

Anousheh Ansari (the first female commercial space flight participant, and the first Muslim woman to travel to space): What We Do Matters More Than Labels.

Especially love her point here:

Remind people of who they really are, and not which box they are in, because
those lines [that divide us] really do not exist.

And,
Janet Haag (executive director of Fellowship in Prayer, and organization that calls people to interfaith spiritual practice): Let Us Pray -- With or Without a National Day of Prayer.

As she reminds us:

As a number of wise people have observed, "Prayer doesn't change God; prayer
changes us." We are in need of such transformation-- to become reconcilers,
peacemakers, and justice-bearers. I think those values are shared by theists,
non-theists and athiests-- all who hope for a better world.

amen to that.

cheers & jeers: des moines version

2010-03-25T07:35:00.000-07:00

first, the good news: des moines' own Drake University invited Shira Tarrant, from California State University, Long Beach, to speak on campus yesterday about sexual assault and how it shouldn't be up to women to prevent their own assaults (well, isn't that a radical idea!). Best quote:

"A lot of the conversation is that women should walk in groups and wear a whistle," she said. "Well, maybe men should wear a whistle and if they think they're going to rape somebody, they should blow it so people can stay away from them."

Kudos to Drake, for taking a proactive and (sadly) progressive step toward raising awareness about sexual assault & violence against women. the question is: what's the next step?

THIS is the kind of thing i want Iowa to be known for.

--

now for the bad news: Dave Leach, a Des Moines anti-abortion activist and confidant to the man convicted earlier this year of murdering a Kansas abortion provider, will be the Republican candidate for state Senate in district 31.

this guy is freaky. really domestic-terrorism-kind of freaky.

Since the conviction [of Roeder], Leach has kept in constant contact with Roeder, eventually releasing to the media a 10-minute interview he conducted with Roeder where he said he had no regrets for what he had done and little sympathy for the family of his victim.

this is NOT the kind of thing i want Iowa to be known for.

i can't participate in this particular election (not my district)- but if you live in Des Moines District 31- vote for Matt McCoy! keep this murder-apologist Leach out of office!

where to start?

2010-03-17T08:15:00.000-07:00

do we start by helping ethiopian women? this piece by London Independent journalist Johann Hari is terrifying, heartbreaking, and infuriating.

"In 2003 - the last year for which statistics are available - the National Committee on Traditional Practices of Ethiopia found that 69 per cent of marriages begin like this, with the triple-whammy of abduction, rape, and a forced signature. In a country with a mixture of Protestant, Catholic and Muslim, all religions practice it equally."

but it's also deeply, deeply inspiring, because the women are making a difference. they are actually saving their sisters, daughters, and friends. they are literally changing minds and attitudes.

"...cultures can change when women are given a chance"

this is a MUST-READ article.

--

or, do we start in our own backyard, with our own armed forces? CNN reports that the Pentagon is crowing about how their work to encourage more reporting of sexual assault in the military is working.

"According to the new report, the Department of Defense had two sexual assaults per 1,000 service members in fiscal year 2009. The Army reported 2.6 per 1,000 soldiers; the Navy reported 1.6 per 1,000; the Air Force reported 1.4 per 1,000; and the Marine Corps had 1.3 per 1,000."

"Pentagon officials have said that even though there have been improvements that allow military personnel to report cases, they estimate that only between 10 percent and 20 percent of people who were sexually assaulted report the crime."

here are my take-aways from this piece:

1. the Army is the most dangerous place for women in our armed forces, but not by much.

2. officials sure are proud of this supposed proof that REPORTS are increasing. too bad they still don't have a clue about how many women are actually raped by their fellow soldiers, because reporting a rape pretty much guarantees you further humiliation and abuse (including professional abuse- being denied promotions and advancement.) when they take some real action to STOP RAPE in the military, then i'll share their enthusiasm.

3. according to the Women's Memorial organization, there were approximately 208,000 women in active duty in the u.s. armed forces in 2009. so if 2 out of 1000 were sexually assaulted last year, that means over 400 women* are assaulted while serving their country, by their fellow soldiers. this is unacceptable.

*i should note- the gender of the person reporting the sexual assault was not given in the article...a few of them may be men too. equally unacceptable.
not equally as threatening to male service members (as in, a threat hanging daily over their heads just because they are a male service member), but equally unacceptable, certainly.

double jeopardy in haiti

2010-03-16T19:06:00.000-07:00

why am i not surprised that this story is being reported? why am i not surprised that, after surviving the horror of the earthquake in haiti, women and girls are still being forced to live in fear for their lives daily (and nightly). why am i not surprised that officials took weeks to respond, and there is still nothing being done to actually STOP this war on women?

i don't even know what to say. i'm unsurprised. but that doesn't mean my heart doesn't break for these women. they persevered and survived the natural disaster, and now they are living in a human disaster, being faced with the absolute worst of humanity. they have nothing, and no one, and then these rapists try to steal their self-worth.

support efforts to stop the rape of earthquake victims in haiti.

scream-worthy

2010-03-16T08:27:00.000-07:00

here's what's making me want to scream today:

Fat Hatred
it's insidious "because being fat is viewed not only as a flaw, but as a flaw by choice, a moral failing due to weakness of character." (via Shakesville)

love this last line- so maddeningly true, for so many women:

There is not "a thin person" inside of me screaming to get out. There is only me, screaming for my right to exist in the body I have.

Prude? (warning- graphic descriptions of sex in the linked article)
objectification. so old news, isn't it? women are objectified every day, in every medium. great blog post from Ms. Magazine about the effects of that omnipresent objectification. but my question is- so how to we really stop it? really?

the answer i'm coming up with more and more often is: women need to make more MONEY. feminists need to acquire wealth. instead of making feminism our life's work, we need to make money like everyone else, and then we can use it to advance our feminist ideals. but without the power that comes with having serious capital, how will we, for example, have any effect on the development, production and marketing of movies and tv shows that objectify us? really? how will we?

Afghan women fear loss of hard-won progress
what the author of this article in the Washington Post really means to say, i think, is that Afghan women fear what women all over the world fear (and in particular, what u.s. women rightfully fear this week as well, as health care purportedly comes up for a "final" vote): BEING THROWN UNDER THE BUS.

forgive us if we find it hard to swallow when men in positions of power and leadership say, "trust us, we have your best interest in mind."

After 13 years, police still hunting for East Coast Rapist
hunted like animals; women are victims of men's violence every day. how is it possible that rape is still tolerated in this country. that rapists are not convicted for the predatory criminals that they are, and in fact, rape kits are put on a shelf and never even tested for DNA?

how.
is.
this.
possible?
unless there is a real and systematic repression of women going on? women's voices, women's abuses, and women's lives are silenced, covered up (unless they are deemed "sexy"), and ignored. it's real. and every woman in america is affected by it.

How We're Doing: Women and Wealth
this is staggering. literally staggering. Ms. Magazine brings light to the recent study by the Insight Center for Community Economic Development, also highlighted in the Pittsburg Post-Gazette, which reveals:

1. single white women (between the ages of 36-49) make only 61% as much as white men on average. that 61% works out to a median wealth of about $42,600. (and wealth = all owned assets)

chew on that for a minute. lily ledbetter knows what i'm talking about.
next,

2. single black women (of the same age) have a median wealth of $5.
you didn't read that incorrectly. 1,2,3,4,5.

$5.

now either EVERY single black woman between 36-49 is ____(fill in the blank with the disgusting stereotypes of welfare-abusing/drug-abusing/lazy/stupid/makesmewanttothrowup)...

OR

maybe, just maybe, there are system-level inequalities that contribute to this sickening gap in wealth & self-sufficiency. for instance: as a white woman who was raised in a two-parent home, it was just sort of expected that i would attend college. (it was NOT expected that my parents would pay for it.) so i worked 3 jobs and applied for scholarships and made it through.

but what if i hadn't come from a 2-parent household? what if neither of my parents had college educations? what if i couldn't find work on the radio (which i did) because my voice sounded "too black"? what if no one told me about the opportunities to test out of entry-level courses, which enabled me to graduate early and accumulate less debt?

The U.S. has a long history of policies that transferred wealth from people of
color to whites [...]As examples, the Indian Removal Act of 1830 forcibly
removed Cherokees from their traditional lands to make room for white settlers.
Jim Crow laws kept African Americans out of better paying jobs, quality public
education and business opportunities. The benefits of citizenship, open to
Europeans, was forbidden to Asian immigrants. The exclusion of Social Security
coverage for a whole generation of farm workers, laborers and domestic workers,
kept Latino and black elders in poverty. Advantage and disadvantage is passed
from generation to generation, often with a cumulative effect, thereby
contributing to the current racial wealth gap.

it isn't a myth. race matters, especially to women. to women's lives.

so, what makes YOU want to scream today?

violence = violence

2010-03-14T17:51:00.001-07:00

anyone who knows me would (hopefully) tell you that i care about cultural sensitivity and that i respect and admire differences in culture, religion, background, etc.

what i do not respect is the way some people (not any particular culture as a whole, or religion...but people who care more about power and dominion than their fellow human being) use their culture or religion as an excuse to perpetrate violence against women and girls.

this is a great blog post from Madre, an incredible organization dedicated to fighting violence against women, creating financial equality and building peace. their blog highlights all kinds of amazing efforts, and the one they link to in this blog post, the Global Campaign to Stop Killing and Stoning Women looks like something i'd admire too- so straightforward and truthful. violence against women cannot be hidden behind the veil of religion, culture or tradition.

violence is ALWAYS violence. it's never right.

Women in the World Cheat Sheet

2010-03-14T17:37:00.000-07:00

this is so great, and i love how they've called it a cheat sheet. for any time you need to quickly remember the way to solve problems for women (which become problems for men, of course)-

here are the ways to do it, clear and simple:

1. Get men on board

2. Pay families that embrace change

3. Publicize victims' stories

4. Support a woman entrepreneur through microcredit

5. Give a woman a phone

6. Build bridges

none of these are difficult strategies, or earth-shattering ideas. they make sense. give women a voice, access, capital, and support. period.

this cheat sheet needs to be on every senator & representative's desk, on every president, prime minister and world leader's agenda. voila! treating women equally leads to equal opportunities, which leads to healthier communities.

conference envy

2010-03-11T08:04:00.000-08:00

i SOOOO wish i could be in new york this weekend for the Women in the World Summit.

Hillary Clinton, Queen Raina, Meryl Streep, Madeline Albright, Katie Couric, Valerie Jarrett, Christiane Amanpour, Shohreh Aghdashloo, Tina Brown...

i would just DIE. die die die! what an unbelievable and ambitious project, with the simple purpose to "discuss the urgent challenges facing women and girls around the world, from sex slavery to child marriage to domestic violence. Most importantly, we’ll be highlighting concrete solutions—ways we all can support efforts to empower women in the face of horrific trends." (Tina Brown)

i can't wait to follow all the action on twitter. i can't even hardly describe how much i wish i could attend. seriously, i would DIE!

i'll try to post interesting & compelling tidbits throughout the summit as i see them.

things that make you go... UGH.

2010-03-04T06:41:00.000-08:00

NPR is currently doing a series on campus rape...today's installment is particularly good, or bad, depending on your perspective:

There's a common assumption about men who commit sexual assault on a college
campus: That they made a one-time, bad decision. But psychologist David Lisak
says this assumption is wrong —-and dangerously so.

the story goes on to refute the usual assuption that college men who rape are generally good guys who just made 1 bad decision. in fact, it seems that "On college campuses, repeat predators account for 9 out of every 10 rapes."

uh-huh. why am i not surprised? in our culture, and around the world, women are expendable commodities. frankly, with all our take-back-the-night rallies and public awareness campaigns and educational efforts, i don't think we have yet come close to reaching the point at which the majority of men actually think that rape (when they do it) is wrong.

the first and most important step is to stop treating rape on college campuses as a 'violation of the campus conduct code'. (are you kidding me?) just because it happens within a college community, and is perpetrated by a person who is paying tuition, doesn't mean rape is not a CRIME. the first and third parts of the NPR series dealt specifically with the ludicrously lax treatment of rapists on college campuses. not only is the college to blame, but this investigative series actually tracked culpability all way up to the US Department of Education (which ruled that the university in question did not need to expell the man found guilty of raping a fellow student.) so colleges give rapists a slap on the wrist, and the federal government says it's ok. awesome.

there is currently new leadership in charge of the Dept of Ed office which investigates these kinds of situations, appointed by President Obama. let's hope we can start to see rape being taken more seriously under a president who actually purports to care about women's rights.

STOP RAPE.

Resources:

http://www.stoprapenow.org/

http://www.mencanstoprape.org/

http://www.now.org/issues/violence/NOW_Sexual_Assault_Toolkit.pdf **"Take Action Against Sexual Assault on Campus"**

http://www.securityoncampus.org/

Women Unbound! Update

2010-02-28T20:01:00.000-08:00

Well, I've finally finished my first of two books for the Women Unbound! challenge I joined this year! I've just completed The Robber Bride, by Margaret Atwood. Here are my thoughts:

I will admit- this book took me a little while to get in the groove. I loved two other Atwood novels, (A Handmaid's Tale, and Oryx & Crake), but hadn't read anything of hers that wasn't dystopian/sci-fi yet. Turns out, I sort of prefer that style to this one. The Robber Bride is the story of four women, friends since college, and the connections and disconnections throughout their lives, fueled by the antics of Zenia, the sexpot friend whose life is either enviable or pitiable, depending on whether she has stolen your husband yet.

I just felt like this story was a little bit anti-climactic. Atwood does (as always) create such realistic, identifiable and unique characters. These women are fascinating people. But their story unfolded a little slowly for my taste. Also, I wanted at least one of them to find their ultimate self-worth apart from their husbands (or the loss thereof). But they were focused almost exclusively on holding on to the men. As I read, I kept saying to myself, "Why do they let her get away with wreaking all this havoc on their lives?" The 'girl drama' actually became a little distracting, for me.

Overall, I did enjoy the story, but it didn't compel me. I appreciate the interesting female characters, (and they were interesting), but in the end, I was hoping for a little more adventure, and that just isn't the kind of book this was.

I definitely haven't been put off of reading Atwood. Her prose is always gorgeous, and I look forward to the next opportunity to read her work.

refusing to be ignored

2010-02-09T14:50:00.000-08:00

wow.

what a powerful essay by Mona Eltahawy, about the horror of, and real reason behind, the practice of female genital mutilation.

"[The] analogy of penis chopping was absurd not just because if boys were being
mutilated the world would not be so silent but because, really, who would want
to control male sexuality? We invent little blue pills to boost it."

like so many other practices which are ingrained, entrenched and generally accepted, FGM is about so much more than the actual physical act. it's about power and control.

as is rape.
as is the wage gap.
as are standards of beauty.

and all this manipulation, subjugation, and control over women is everywhere.

no really. EVERYWHERE.

"Prevalent mostly in Africa, the Middle East and parts of Asia, FGM is no
longer a traditional practice that harms girls just "over there". As a result of
immigration and refugee movements, FGM is now being practiced in the U.S.
Canada, Europe, Australia and New Zealand."

it is NOT just "over there" that women are cut.
it is NOT just "over there" that raped women are murdered because they bring shame to their husband or father's family.
it is NOT just "over there" that women and girls are kept from reaching their full potential by lack of education, resource and the simple encouragement to try, while boys not only receive all those things, but are expected to be successful socially, financially and sexually.

these symptoms of sexism harm women AND men. girls AND boys.

what if human beings could find a way to treat one another as equally valued, of equal worth and dignity...? wow, indeed.

for now, i applaud Mona Eltahawy and women like her who are refusing to be ignored.

a post about football (yes, really! sort of.)

2010-02-05T07:42:00.000-08:00

i hadn't planned on cheering for the saints in the big game (frankly, i hadn't given it any thought at all). but i believe i shall, now!

Scott Fujita shows us all how to be respectful, support equal civil rights, AND a be great linebacker, all at the same time! (via Jezebel) not your usual testosterone-y triumverate.

thoughtful analysis of class-related nuances to reproductive rights? CHECK.

speaking out publicly and in the locker room on issues that have the potential to be viewed as gendered (aka breast cancer is a women's disease) and/or effeminate? CHECK.

choosing to play for the saints in post-katrina new orleans, and use his "small platform as a professional football player" because he believes life is about MORE than just football? CHECK.

well-played, Mr. Fujita. well-played indeed. allies show up in the most unlikely places sometimes. go saints!

blog for choice!

2010-01-22T08:16:00.000-08:00

today is the 37th anniversary of roe v. wade. NARAL Pro Choice America celebrates this milestone through Blog for Choice Day!

In honor of Dr. George Tiller, who often wore a button that simply read, "Trust Women," this year's Blog for Choice Day question is: What does Trust Women mean to you? in order to participate- just answer the question, and make sure to let NARAL know that you are participating!

so, to me, Trust Women means that i wouldn't have to hear anything like "don't worry your pretty little head about it" ever again.

turns out, my pretty little head is perfectly capable of worrying about anything it wants to, and furthermore, it has every right to worry, fret, parse, weigh or decide what's right for its own self, tyvm. (also: condescending much? )

Trust Women covers so much ground. it makes me think of so many issues in addition to reproductive rights: from the prosecution of sex-workers (instead of the johns) to the treatment of women atheletes, academics and politicians, to equal pay.

"Trust Women" is a sobering reminder that so much of the world still needs reminding that women are of inherently equal value, and should be treated as such. period. full stop.

----

in other news- how much do i love Mo"Nique's hairy legs at the globes last weekend?? (via Feministing). judging by all the uproar about her awesome mashup of furry-and-french pedicure, clearly women aren't even trusted to make the right choices about their own LEGS.
*eye roll*

random rants

2010-01-20T12:02:00.001-08:00

a couple of items that caught my eye during my daily headline perusal:

3 recent "domestic" fatalities in iowa seen as a coincidence.
except they're no coincidence. they are all products of the same system that devalues women's lives and glorifies violence and abuse as acceptable solutions to conflict. that system goes by many names, but his friends call him patriarchy.

to spawn or not to spawn
i feel a lot of the same frustrations Lucy does. like her, there are some children i dearly love (my perfect niece being one of them!), and find babies endearing (when they aren't smelly, loud or messy.) but i have ZERO interest in creating one of my own. zilch. nada. zip. not only do i not feel any sort of biological imperative personally, i'm radical enough in my beliefs about our exploding global population, i usually have to bite my tongue when i hear about people having babies for the purposes of "carrying on the family name" (are you kidding? it's a NAME. adopt a child and give them your name! but that's a whole other discussion re: the importance of men's names...) or "to feel complete" (isn't that pretty much the definition of co-dependency? needing another being to complete you?).

anyway- the pressure to have babies is omnipresent for women my age. while i do believe women who choose to bear children should not be treated unequally, paid less, or be automatically assumed to be the primary caregivers (unless they chose to have a baby without a partner; and, stay-at-home mom should be a paid position with benefits), i also believe that women who choose not to have children should receive equitable treatment. in other words- the decision whether or not to have babies should be no more defining than the decision to have extra foam on her latte. fertility should not be a moral issue.

see also: choosing not to bear children for ecological reasons; and, if men had babies.

and finally today, Jessica Valenti takes on feminist elitism in a really interesting blog post. she says (and i agree):

Everybody – whether or not they take Women’s Studies, have read Judith Butler or
heard of Foucault – deserves to have feminism in their lives.

I am proudly someone who tries to convince women that feminism will make their
lives better – not only because it’s the truth, but because then those same
women go on to change their families, communities and even country.

i should say, i bet the author Jessica is refuting (Nina Power) would have some really interesting things to say as well. but it struck me as i read Jessica's post- what if more women (like, significantly more...like, ALL women) realized all the positive impacts feminism could have, and has had, on their lives? what if all women really did believe that women (individually and as a class) are people too? the world as we know it would look radically different if more than half its population actually did think that women were 'created equal'.

yep, i read things like that and i start doing the math in my head (no small feat, as i am of course, a woman, and those numbers- they just fly right out of my head!). how many more years have i likely got on this planet? how much progress can we make in that time? could i actually live to see the day?

here's hoping!

DERAIL: Battle of the Bards

2010-01-12T06:53:00.001-08:00

well, to completely switch gears from my normal raving...i've just joined a little contest, a literary battle royale actually, brought to us by Padfoot & Prongs. as usual, i originally heard about this on my sister Eli's AMAZING blog, Need More Shelves- she's always got the latest & greatest page-turning news!

so all you have to do is take a look at the bracket (this first battle is, naturally, selected works of shakespeare, but i think they're going to do more!), and choose your winners!

then, register for the battle (BY JAN 18!) as they instruct.

finally, EMAIL them with your choices! the person who accumulates the most points through their picks, wins ooh, aah, fabulous prizes!

THE GRAND PRIZE (ooooohhhh ahhhhhhhhh)
That's right marauders. For that lucky thespian who gets the most guesses accurate, at their door they will find a literary package filled with treasures galore.

The grand prize includes:
1. A copy of the winning Shakespeare play (plus an assortment 4 plays of your choice).
2. A custom mug featuring the B.o.B logo
3. Any prize of your choosing from the GBI Etsy store
4. Oh and wait for it...... a 20$ gift card to B&N courtesy of Padfoot
and Prongs.
4. Other literary mystery prizes that will begin to pop up as the contest
progresses, (not just for the winner) so be sure to participate and check back often.

so, i've got my picks! frankly, i have less than zero interest in the real march madness, so this is much more my style! :) (and really, how could Romeo & Juliet not win??? so really, it's all about the strategy for picking the winners up to the final battle, IMHO.)

OH, i almost forgot- you (well, i) need to remember to go back to Padfoot & Prongs' blog and VOTE throughout the battle! the winners will be chosen by popular vote!

leeeeeet's get ready to rrrrrrrrrrrrumbllllllleee!!!!!!! (hee!)

home run, hillary!

2010-01-11T11:50:00.000-08:00

Hills hit it out of the park on friday in a speech abou tthe 15th anniversary of the conference in Cairo for global population development!

highlights:

"Too often, still today in 2010, women and girls bear the burdens of
regional and global crises, whether it’s an economic downturn or climate change
or political instability. They still are the majority of the world’s poor,
unschooled, unhealthy, and underfed. They are rarely the cause of violent conflicts, but increasingly they bear the consequences of such conflicts."

"Global rates of maternal mortality remain perilously high; one woman dies
every minute of every day in pregnancy or childbirth, and for every woman who dies, another 20 suffer from injury, infection, or disease every minute."

"An estimated 70 million – that is 70 million women and girls worldwide – have been subjected to female genital cutting, a procedure that is not only painful and traumatic but is also the source of infections and increased risks of injury during childbirth."

"When a girl becomes a mother before she becomes literate, when a woman
gives birth alone and is left with a permanent disability, when a mother toils
daily to feed her large family but cannot convince her husband to agree to
contraception, these struggles represent suffering that can and should be
avoided. They represent potential that goes unfulfilled."

"Investing in the health of women, adolescents, and girls is not only the
right thing to do; it is also the smart thing to do."

"We are doing all of these things because we have seen that when women and
girls have the tools to stay healthy and the opportunity to contribute to their
families’ well-being, they flourish and so do the people around them."

right on, madam secretary.

what can I do?

2010-01-11T08:40:00.000-08:00

fact: i pretty much worship eve ensler. everything that woman says is everything i wish i were smart enough to come up with on my own. she's brilliant, and inspiring.

fact: every nine seconds, a woman is beaten in the U.S. like this woman from des moines, who "had bruises on almost every part of her body caused by [her abuser] hitting, punching, kicking and pushing her over the past few weeks."

fact: in the Congo, it's much, much worse.

it all seems so inevitable, so overwhelming, so impossible to change, doesn't it?

but here's why i love eve ensler. in her recent HuffPo piece on the violence in the Congo, she suggests 10 actions we can ALL take to affect change...but the last two are so perfect, so applicable to us all, and so DO-ABLE.

9. Talk about the Congo everywhere you go

Be a pain in the ass. Ruin cocktail parties. Stop traffic. Give
sermons. Insert facts about Congo in every possible occasion, i.e., in response
to "How are you today?," you might say: "Well, I would be okay if women weren't
being raped in the DRC...."

Host teach-ins and screen V-Day's film Turning Pain to Power. Visit vday.org to access
both.

10. Get angry and stop being polite

Feel what your sister, mother, grandmother, daughter, wife, girlfriend
would be feeling if she were being gang raped or held as a sex slave for years
or if her insides were destroyed by sticks and guns and she could never have
another baby.

Feel feel feel.

Open yourself to feeling.

THAT'S what i'm trying to do with this blog...and hopefully i succeed, some of the time.

"the destruction of the female species"

2010-01-04T07:45:00.000-08:00

as usual, eve ensler has hit it out of the park with her piece on huffpo from last week.

the women of the congo still live in fear every day.

Over twelve years, this war, this brutally inconceivable violence has raged on.
Almost six million dead. Almost 500 thousand raped. You tell the story of horror
and atrocity one too many times and then you realize nothing is changing and
that the world goes on getting its minerals, supporting its luxuries and the
death, massacres rapes and tortures of millions do not matter. And then you
can't find a real reason for wanting to live in humanity or be part of this
world but you don't want to kill yourself so you start screaming out, screaming
and screaming out and then you get called intense, angry and then mad. Because
that is what people who have crossed over get called.
At what point are we all going to cross over?

let's try this- instead of these women's names sounding unfamiliar and their location seeming remote, why don't we substitute our own names and hometowns? really. read that article again, and insert your name.

Mwamirindi/Carolynn was held as a sex slave and pieces of her flesh were cut every
few days. She was raped for months and watched them rape her sister in law who
they killed and cut open and served for dinner and then when Mwamirindi/Carolynn finally escaped and returned home, she was expelled by her husband who sold her land and house and threw her and her children into the street. Now she is three months pregnant with a baby from the rapes.

terrifying, isn't it? but it is REALITY for these women.

eve calls the situation there "the destruction of the female species of the Congo".

how can it be anything else?

---

in related news, evidence is piling up that the recession is indeed sparking an increase in violence against women and children domestically. BIG surprise there.

support V-day, support your local women's shelter, support your lawmakers who DO SOMETHING to stop gender-based violence (and ask those who don't if they consider their mothers, sisters, daughters and wives just collateral damage?)

more than half our population is at risk.

reflection

2009-12-30T12:58:00.001-08:00

i haven't blogged a lot recently, for a few reasons. holidays are busy, but also because i'm not sure what i'm doing here, frankly. i rant & rave, but i often end up only feeling worse after. what is really changing in the world for women? i saw this article yesterday and it just sort of hit me: what good am i actually doing? i'm not despairing of the work of feminist organizations, foundations, and individuals who care about eliminating sexism and inequality...but of my own role in the pursuit.

"This month over 350 girls have had their sexual organs mutilated as part of the
traditional practices of their culture."

and this is only one indicator, of course. i feel powerless to make any real change. i follow (and am endlessly inspired and incited by) a number of outstanding feminist bloggers daily (Feministe, I Blame the Patriarchy, Feministing, Shakesville, Fannie's Room, Madre, NOW, V-Day, Well Behaved Women Rarely Make History), but even those eloquent and vocal advocates...individually and collectively...what are they (we) changing? i know i don't even keep up with a tiny portion of all the incredible voices out there in the world, calling for change, but all those voices still seem so quiet sometimes, in the face of the unrelenting and brutal violence, discrimination and degradation of women: every day, in every city and town, in every country, all over this world. WHY is it so impossible to comprehend that women are beings of EQUAL value, worth and dignity, and should be treated as such, in every way? WHY is respect such a rare commodity? WHY is brutality against women and girls considered inevitable, just a part of life, something WE (women) need to be vigilant in order to avoid? (don't walk to your car in the dark, take self-defense classes, don't wear short skirts, etc. etc. etc.)

"...we categorize brutal violence against a partner or spouse as "domestic
issues" ... as if they bear the same level of importance as sweeping the floor
or doing the dishes. "

WHY hadn't i thought of that?? wow, that just pisses me off. i'll do my best never to refer to violence against women as DOMESTIC ever again.

in 2010, i want to be more active, think more critically, and be less tolerant of discrimination (in every form).

this could very well be the cheesiest thing i've ever written, but recently i just can't stop listening to Defying Gravity (of course i've loved the song - from the musical Wicked - since i first heard it a couple of years ago, but maybe it's because i just got the Glee soundtrack for christmas, wahoo!). the lyrics just could not be more apt to how i'm feeling right now:

I'm through accepting limits
'Cause someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try, I'll never know!
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost!
...
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you won't bring me down!

i let things get me down, for sure. but in 2010 i want to try to make a difference on a personal, local level, where i can (maybe) see the ripple effect of my efforts more directly. i know this about myself: i tend toward being darkly pessimistic, or at least staunchly cynical. i've been feeling that pessimism lately, and i want to swing back toward optimism in the new year.

i've been considering some new ink, and i believe i may have decided on what to get, which coincides with my feeling of surging determination.

just one word, reminiscent of one (or 2) of my favorite songs, as well as our daily struggle for our rights.

RISE.

rise up in 2010!

what do we have to be thankful for?

2009-11-25T06:47:00.000-08:00

i'm thankful for this guy ( @nhavey), who posted this piece on HuffPo regarding the recent Sacred Heart University lacrosse team rape case (yep, another one), and i'm thankful for the way he clearly and articulately outlines the rape myths being flung about. i'm so tired of hearing people say 'boys will be boys' and 'she should have known better'.

also, if this article about the power of investing in women farmers in the developing world doesn't make you want to revolt (love that call to action, btw), we need to talk. (follow the author @dansilverstein)

now, on to what i'm NOT thankful for. some of this isn't really NEWs any more...but i've been kind of distracted lately, and haven't had time to post.

1. brazilian woman expelled from university for wearing a mini-skirt. (this in the country for whom the brazilian bikini wax is named???)

2. australian students create pro-rape facebook group. (because that's not inciting violence at all.)

3. the World Economic Forum says the U.S. is 31st in the world in terms of women's equality in matters of politics, education, health and economic opportunity. we rank LOWER than yemen, cambodia, the phillipines, mexico and venezuela in women's health and survival.

4. british police are treating rape victims skeptically if they have been drinking, were in the wrong part of town or have reported a previous rape. (translation: she asked for it.)

i'd really like to experience a thanksgiving, in my lifetime, when i can say i'm thankful for women's emancipation from rape, freedom from discrimination, and equality in every nation.

responsibility: men, what's your policy?

2009-11-02T13:07:00.000-08:00

i found this article ("Is Feminism Men's Work Too?") to be a well-reasoned and effective call to action for male feminists.

i especially appreciate this quotation from Khary Lazarre-White, founder of Brotherhood/Sister Sol in NYC, and the overt connection he makes between feminism and morality.

“It is personally important for me to do this work because I try to live my life by a moral and ethical compass, and I know that fighting sexism is a daily lived responsibility—from structural organizational work decisions, to personal relationships, to how one lives one’s life.”

in other words, it is ethical to join the feminist movement; the unequal treatment of women is immoral.

Women Unbound!

2009-11-02T12:22:00.000-08:00

well this is cool!

Women Unbound reading challenge, recommended to me by my sister, (who, by the way, blogs at As Usual, I Need More Bookshelves. Check her out!)

hmm...i've never posted any book reviews, but this feminist reading challenge is perfect for me, because i can join the challenge at a lower level of commitment ("Philogynist: read at least two books, including at least one nonfiction one.") to just dip my toes in. :)

so i suppose i should pick a couple of books...i might have to cheat and choose from my sister's list (she is, after all, my personal librarian- i don't even bother picking books on my own any more!) ok, the two books i will ready by November 30, 2010 are:

Fiction: The Robber Bride, Margaret Atwood
(yay! my sister had this on her list, which reminded me that i actually already have this book!)

Non-Fiction: ???
i confess, i don't read as much non-fiction as i'd like. (well, i don't read as much as i'd like PERIOD, but particularly not non-fiction.) but i think i've got something at home i can commit to reading...just need to choose. my non-fiction choice is TBA.

ETA: I'm going to choose from these three, apparently thematic, non-fiction choices:

Dance of the Dissident Daughter, Sue Monk Kidd

When God was a Woman, Merlin Stone

Out of the Garden: Women Writers on the Bible, ed. Christina Buchmann & Celina Spiegel

also, here's the Women Unbound meme to get us started:

1. What does feminism mean to you? Does it have to do with the work sphere? The social sphere? How you dress? How you act?
feminism, to me, is best summed up by the deceptively simple quotation "...feminism is the radical notion that women are people"
although i would probably add one clarification: feminism is the radical notion that women are people who are of equal value, worth and deserving of rights as male people.
doesn't that sound logical? reasonable? and yet it is still undeniably revolutionary.
this applies in every sphere, because in every sphere, women are treated unequally.

2. Do you consider yourself a feminist? Why or why not?
yes, yes, a thousand times YES.

3. What do you consider the biggest obstacle women face in the world today? Has that obstacle changed over time, or does it basically remain the same?
i personally believe violence against women is (should be) the most pressing issue for feminists. the gendercide (literally) of women across the globe is a direct result of the worldwide and historic de-valuing of women as people. when women are not considered to be equal in worth to men, they are abused. they are by default considered to be automatic prey, and unworthy of equal protections, rights and/or dignities. this doesn't happen just to poor women, or uneducated women, or bad women, or good women, or white women or black women or asian women, or straight women, or women who 'should know better' or women who 'asked for it' or to victims. it happens to every woman.

our very culture de-values women on a daily basis, as do cultures around the world.
male = normal and female = not (less than) male.

the more women and men who
1. live by example and treat women with equal respect and dignity every day, and who
2. speak out and stand up against violence against women in every form (verbal, physical, sexual, psychological, overt, covert, institutionalized, racial, religious, educational, professional, personal), and who
3. teach children that women do have equal worth, and sexism, violence against women and inequality are unnaccepatable...

the more quickly change will come.

thanks Eli!!!

rape culture

2009-10-29T09:33:00.000-07:00

more on the teenaged girl raped at her homecoming dance.
this part in particular is the crux of the issue for me:

"I think that teens who get drunk do incur certain risks that we should let them suffer for. They should be allowed to bear all the natural risks that a person faces when that person drinks excessively and nobody commits a criminal violation of their most basic human rights. These risks include: that they may fall and twist an ankle or a knee, tear clothes... puke, wake up with a massive hangover, and get grounded by their parents. That’s what happens when you’re a fifteen year old who gets shitfaced outside the school dance. Those are the risks our sons run as well as our daughters.
Those risks should not include murder, waterboarding, or rape. Each of the latter is a criminal violation of human rights that we should not tolerate, regardless of who the victim is, nice or naughty, drunk or sober, man or woman. Because they are wrong in the big, non-situational sense. These things are not forces of nature. Tornadoes appear on their own due to climatological conditions, but rapes do not self-generate from masses of air. People commit rapes. With staggering frequency, male people commit rapes, and commit them against women."

also- a GREAT analysis of rape culture as a whole, here.
so much of this is just so blatant...and yet so commonplace. people are literally scared, or embarrassed, or WHATEVER, to speak up and say this kind of thing is NOT ok. and THAT is rape culture.

"Rape culture is 1 in 6 women being sexually assaulted in their lifetimes. Rape culture is not even talking about the reality that many women are sexually assaulted multiple times in their lives. Rape culture is the way in which the constant threat of sexual assault affects women's daily movements. Rape culture is telling girls and women to be careful about what you wear, how you wear it, how you carry yourself, where you walk, when you walk there, with whom you walk, whom you trust, what you do, where you do it, with whom you do it, what you drink, how much you drink, whether you make eye contact, if you're alone, if you're with a stranger, if you're in a group, if you're in a group of strangers, if it's dark, if the area is unfamiliar, if you're carrying something, how you carry it, what kind of shoes you're wearing in case you have to run, what kind of purse you carry, what jewelry you wear, what time it is, what street it is, what environment it is, how many people you sleep with, what kind of people you sleep with, who your friends are, to whom you give your number, who's around when the delivery guy comes, to get an apartment where you can see who's at the door before they can see you, to check before you open the door to the delivery guy, to own a dog or a dog-sound-making machine, to get a roommate, to take self-defense, to always be alert always pay attention always watch your back always be aware of your surroundings and never let your guard down for a moment lest you be sexually assaulted and if you are and didn't follow all the rules it's your fault."

"Rape culture is tasking victims with the burden of rape prevention. Rape culture is encouraging women to take self-defense as though that is the only solution required to preventing rape. Rape culture is admonishing women to "learn common sense" or "be more responsible" or "be aware of barroom risks" or "avoid these places" or "don't dress this way," and failing to admonish men to not rape."

"Rape culture is boys under 10 years old knowing how to rape."

"Rape culture is the objectification of women, which is part of a dehumanizing process that renders consent irrelevant. Rape culture is treating women's bodies like public property. Rape culture is street harassment and groping on public transportation and equating raped women's bodies to a man walking around with valuables hanging out of his pockets. Rape culture is most men being so far removed from the threat of rape that invoking property theft is evidently the closest thing many of them can imagine to being forcibly subjected to a sexual assault."

"Rape culture is using the word "rape" to describe something that has been done to you other than a forced or coerced sex act. Rape culture is saying things like "That ATM raped me with a huge fee" or "The IRS raped me on my taxes.""

"Rape culture is people objecting to the detritus of the rape culture being called oversensitive, rather than people who perpetuate the rape culture being regarded as not sensitive enough."

in other words. our culture is programmed to excuse rape. because we do it every day in so many ways we don't even realize we're doing it. women's bodies are property, therefore women are expected to take the responsibility for protecting their property, instead of making the degrading, defiling and theft of said property socially and morally unacceptable!

changing rape culture is a change of our CULTURE to afford each person equal value, worth, and rights. true equity is necessary to end rape culture.

safety in numbers

2009-10-28T07:45:00.000-07:00

just imagine if you were this teenaged girl's parents. you send her off to her high school homecoming dance. take tons of pictures of her in her new dress, with her hair done, and standing nervously next to her date. before you know it, she's called for a ride home...uh-oh. wondering what kind of adolescent embarassment or BFF squabble might have precipitated the early call, you get in the car to go pick her up.

except that you can't find her at the school gym.

when you do find her, she's been raped, beaten and robbed. by several men. in front of numerous other people. who did nothing to help her.

what could have been going through those people's minds? she deserved it? she asked for it? she should have known better?

the only message this kind of horror gives us is that women are considered OBJECTS, worthless and expendable.
still.
today.

equality is not a reality for women. no matter how many of us like to think 'we've come a long way baby'. not until the rape and torture of women on a daily basis is erradicated. and if we can't even do that in our own neighborhoods, how can we hope to do anything for the women in the congo, or darfur, or afghanistan?

THIS is what feminism is about. and this is why i can't understand when women and men shy away from that label. is the rape of one in every 4 women ok? does that sound like we've "achieved equality"?? rape culture is the reality. but i do not accept that this will always be the case. and the more of us who do not accept that reality, the sooner we can change it.

STOP RAPE.

brain food

2009-10-26T08:23:00.001-07:00

two totally unrelated, but thought-provoking pieces i read today:

Single in the City: perspective from a single woman in urban India.
"The idea that the single woman is entitled to the full range of freedoms that any other adult does and is entitled to live her life as she chooses is also one that is yet to gain full acceptance in our society."

(lest you think that women actually have equal rights.)

and Remember the Women? about the realities facing afghani women. it's long, but completely eye-opening. i recommend reading the whole thing, and putting yourself in the shoes of an afghan woman.
"The current reality is that...women are denied their most fundamental human rights and risk further violence in the course of seeking justice for crimes perpetrated against them." For women, "human rights are values, standards, and entitlements that exist only in theory and at times, not even on paper."

(lest you think we are accomplishing any lofty goals in our 'war of necessity')

fashion backward

2009-10-26T07:33:00.000-07:00

a busy month and a bit of an inspiration-drought have made for a quiet blog this october...

but today my blood pressure went up a couple of dozen points when i read the following gem:

Not Over The Hill: Secretary Clinton Turns A Stylish 62
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton turns 62 years young today, and we can't help but be sentimental about her style statements over the years. She started out as sassy Miss Rodham sporting striped pants and huge glasses in the '60s, donned sparkles and scarves in the '70s and '80s, and worked up to becoming the 1990s first lady who fancied a good plaid and headbands. And now, as the modern day pantsuit enthusiast, Hillary has certainly covered a lot of sartorial ground. Take a look back at the Queen of the Hill's memorable ensembles...

ok...let's just do a quick run-down:
sexism, check.
agism, check.
total non-sequitur??? CHECK.

what in the world does the Secretary of State's taste in "a good plaid" have to do with anything?

nothing. except that the Secretary of State happens to be a WOMAN. so of course, on her birthday, it makes total sense to publish a retrospective of her STYLE choices, rather than her political ACCOMPLISHMENTS.

bonus: there's also a slide show of michelle obama's "cheap chic" style choices on HuffPo today.
don't get me wrong- i love both of these stylish women. but why oh why aren't we being treated to a slideshow of any male dignitaries?

that's right. because they're men. but when it comes to women, their fashion is the most interesting aspect of their lives, and clearly the top priority in their busy schedules.

not to put too fine a point on this, but here's why this seriously gets under my skin: when we focus our national attention on a female politician/public figure's FASHION choices, rather than their social, political or humanitarian choices, we are implicitly MOVING and SECONDING the notion that this is the extent of said woman's worth. this is what matters to women: CLOTHES. we don't want to bother our pretty little heads with anything more significant than today's choice of printed j.crew cardigans.

and that implicit message leads to explicit sexist treatment of women from the board room to the stock room to the courtroom to the hospital room.

to sum up: if you're going to give me a retrospective slideshow of hillary clinton's wardrobe, either include her corresponding political milestones along with the designer's names, or show me bill's annual pantsuit choices on his birthday too. (yeah right)

better yet. stop wasting bandwidth with this kind of offensive and patriarchal crap. arguably the two most powerful women in the united states deserve to be regarded as more than mannequins. we all do.

gendercide

2009-10-12T12:10:00.000-07:00

this book is on my list: Half the Sky: Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide

among the alarming findings: 1 maternal death every MINUTE worldwide.

this review (among others) reminds me why i gotta read this book.

check it out!

weapon du jour

2009-10-06T08:41:00.000-07:00

in the west-african country of Guinea last week, an unarmed crowd of political protestors numbering about 50,000 was fired upon and violently disbanded by governmental military forces. depending on the source, between 50 and 150 people were killed.

"Cellphone snapshots, ugly and hard to refute, are circulating here and feeding rage: they show that women were the particular targets of the Guinean soldiers..."

particular attention was paid to dehumanizing and violating women during the clash. witnesses state that at least 6-10 women were beaten, gang-raped and/or brutally attacked (whipped, stabbed, clubbed).

this strategy, of course, is not new. secretary of state hillary clinton addressed the UN Security Council last week and the council passed a resolution condemning rape as a weapon of war.

but what is going to be done to halt the use of this weapon? will there be any funding to back up the UN's resolution? with more than 200,000 women raped in the congo alone, frankly, this weapon is proving to be more dangerous to the world's population than nuclear weapons have been to date. why isn't there a UN sanctioned and funded watchdog group like the IAEA going into wartorn countries and calling international attention to the atrocities being committed against women every day? putting pressure on world powers to bring economic and social powers to bear against countries that allow this weapon to be used freely? reducing the proliferation of this deadly weapon across the globe, just as nuclear arms proliferation is carefully controlled?

rape is epidemic, systemic and, as research clearly shows, completely destructive to the fabric of a community.

"Community leaders noted that the frequent and extreme brutality committed with impunity during wave after wave of armed occupation has resulted in the disintegration of the moral and social fabric in many localities. Social stigma has left large numbers of rape victims and children born of rape rejected by their families and communities. Many cases of HIV and other infections remain untested and untreated. Fear of going to fields and markets--sites where rapes often take place--has resulted in spiraling malnutrition and economic loss. Widespread criminal impunity and inadequate local and regional governance leave communities without the means to reduce the violence."

communities are wiped out by rape as weapon of war, just as surely as they would be by weapons of mass destruction. in fact, rape SHOULD be considered a WMD. it clearly creates mass casualties in its wake; but to date, rape has not been a priority on the worldwide security agenda.

(i'll give you one guess who's in the majority at the highest levels of world leadership/governance?)

Whip It: Ur doin' it right.

2009-10-05T10:06:00.000-07:00

here's a post i wrote in response to a friend of mine's entry about the new Drew Barrymore movie, Whip It.

my friend Scott's blog is a really interesting perspective from a filmmaker/screenwriter based in iowa. i just happened to disagree with one point he made about the new roller derby film...that by having the main character completely turn away from/reject from the pageant dreams her mother has for her, the character/movie is somehow a little less three-dimensional. the rejection of the traditionally feminine (and more stereotypically desireable) role somehow automatically lessened the character's attractiveness, or real-ness, or value.

i begged to differ.

i think the movie can still be three-dimensional with NOBODY choosing that traditional beauty queen role. in fact, NOT including a character who wanted to pursue that role is a deliberate statement in-and-of itself, and one that is too infrequently made. how refreshing for a movie to allow its female characters to choose the non-traditional role, and be celebrated for it. in my opinion, saying that "they missed a huge opportunity to show some three dimensionality by at least giving a nod to the fact that the tribe some girls may want to be in is being in beauty pageants. What if Page’s best friend in the film would have really been gung-ho for doing the pageant thing?" implies that the pageant thing inherently has more value, is more interesting, or is a more comforting (more safe, less unnerving) option to portray, than the derby thing. which of course, is TRUE in our culture.

the "nod to the fact that the tribe some girls may want to be in is being in beauty pageants" is validated in our society every day, by every fashion magazine and make-up commercial.
that nod is UNDERSTOOD. girls know that being a beauty queen is much more socially acceptable than being a jock. but, from what i've read about it so far, Whip It challenges the audience to accept the fact that girls can be loud, crude, tough and STILL be good people, attractive women, and valuable human beings.

but i have to admit- i really should SEE the movie before i get TOO defensive. ;) too bad i have zero weekends open this month. Whip It is already on my netflix queue.

also- my opinion couldn't possibly have anything to do with my general feelings about beauty pageants. (scholarship program FAIL.) nah, that couldn't be it.

props to my friend Scott for his post- hope he doesn't regret telling me to follow his blog! :) check it out @ http://screenwritingfromiowa.wordpress.com/

cough sputter

2009-10-01T07:35:00.000-07:00

we'd "probably" be a better country if women no longer had the right to vote!?!?!?!?!

i suppose we'd probably be a better country if rape was decriminalized, gays were institutionalized and people of color were segregated too, wouldn't we?

truly: this guy is why our nation and our world is so broken. this guy and the millions of other people like him. he thinks he's just making a little point about 'the good ol' days' (before women were recognized as equally worthy of a voice), but what he's really saying is that anyone who is not exactly like him is simply UNDESERVING of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

polanski

2009-09-30T07:29:00.000-07:00

this is just making me so MAD.

a couple of great articles below that do a great job of illuminating the crux of the polanski issue, for me. (i.e. i don't care how many great movies he's made, or what other tragedies he lived through. he drugged, raped and sodomized a 13-year old girl. end of story. he's deserves to be held to the same standard as any other violent abuser.)

Polanski's Defenders (you gotta be kidding me, people!!)

Roman Polanski Must Finally be Brought to Justice
"Is there really any debate here? Are there really two sides to this story? He raped a child, for Pete's sake. He plied her with drugs, alcohol, and sodomized her. This was not "consensual sex," as a 13-year-old is neither old enough or mature enough to engage in such acts. In America we have laws against 44-year-old men drugging and raping little children. It's absolutely unconscionable that anyone would imply that his cinematic accomplishments should be reason to cut him slack. How dare they."

good explanation of some of the key questions being brought up about the case:
What's "Unlawful Sexual Intercourse"?

edited to add another commentary, to which i say: PREACH IT.
Shame on Polanski Apologists

preach it!

2009-09-24T14:29:00.000-07:00

i only wish i could be this eloquent in explaining why true equality for women is so imperative!

"how can the U.S. become a champion for women globally if we lack the strength, fortitude and resolve to achieve equality here, in the wealthiest democracy in the world?"

not to be outdone...

2009-09-24T13:50:00.001-07:00

it's not just afghanistan where women live in fear for their lives, of course.

the Organization for Women's Freedom in Iraq also operates safe houses, for women in fear due to the increased threat of "honor killings".

i encourage you to follow the link in that article to the full report from 2007 on the link between the civil war in iraq and violence against women. it reiterates the truth of what we see played out in war-torn countries all over the world: "Because of women's role in cultural and biological reproduction, they are often perceived as symbols of group identity. As such, they are specifically targeted in times of communal violence. In 2003, OWFI began reporting cases of 'Islamic groups taking revenge on each other by raping women.' "

women bear the brunt of war on their shoulders.

danger: woman ahead.

2009-09-24T06:56:00.000-07:00

"one of the biggest dangers is to be a woman."

that particular sentence is in reference to afghanistan, but truly, it could be said of nearly every country around the globe.

for the sake of illustration however, afghanistan is the example du jour.

"Afghanistan is a country where for centuries women have been considered property -- not equals, like the constitution states. They are often beaten, raped and even sold to the highest bidder."

"Nearly 90 percent of Afghan women suffer from domestic abuse, according to the United Nations Development Fund for Women. Despite that, there are less than a dozen shelters...in Afghanistan."

"In Afghanistan, a woman is blamed for the injustices she must live through."

if this happens to one woman, we all suffer.
it actually happens to millions of women every day. imagine the consequences.

happy birthday

2009-09-23T07:09:00.000-07:00

victoria woodhull (1838-1927)!

i read marge piercy's book Sex Wars: A Novel of Gilded Age New York not long ago, and i was simultaneously thrilled to learn about a trailblazer like victoria woohull and livid that i hadn't ever heard of her before! the first woman to run for president of the united states, before women could even vote!

[great line from the book, describing the gilded age in nyc: "when every preacher and public official and journalist praised fidelity and chastity and then in private did his best to escape the first and destroy the second." hmm, that sounds vaguely familiar...]

women like woodhull have lived in every age: silenced, abused and ignored...but they have lived nonetheless, and challenged society to live up to its highest ideals. their courage inspires me!

(wow, a happy post for once!)

rape: NOT a public option

2009-09-17T11:43:00.000-07:00

i knew something didn't sit quite right with me when i heard about the following story...
All-women Public Transportation in India
then i read the last paragraph of the article. DUH.

and THEN i saw the following two pieces, which pretty much made me mad, sad and laugh out loud- all at the same time!

Only rapists can prevent rape. (*warning, profanity*)

and, similarly,

Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work!

i want that last one plastered on every locker room, club house and boys' bathroom wall, starting in elementary school. if women are EVER going to be safe, EVERY boy needs to learn, and really KNOW, that rape is not an option.

reminder: the world does not consider you to be human.

2009-09-17T07:25:00.000-07:00

i mean, if you (female reader) were considered human, your life and rights would be treated as sanctimoniously as the purported "life" which exists between two blobs of cells from the moment they touch. personhood? what about the personhood of WOMEN? living, breathing, (voting) women.

also, if you were considered human by the world at large, we wouldn't be reading another story about a woman kept prisoner for decades, raped as a matter of course, forced to bear her rapists multiple spawn, and fear for her life if she so much as thought about seeking help. this woman wasn't considered human. she was considered property. and although we've heard 3 stories like this now in the past year (Fritzl in Austria, Garrido in California, and now this Australian case), i realize it's still extreme.

what isn't extreme is the similaries between the way these women were treated and the way that women all over the world are treated every day! rape, psychological and physical torture, control over mind and body, imprisonment, threats of violence if help is sought...

every day. everywhere. we are attacked, from every angle.

it's not acceptable. we are human, and we deserve equal rights. period. full stop.

yale, yemen, uganda

2009-09-15T07:18:00.000-07:00

annie le's body was found stuffed in a wall in her yale university lab building.

12-year old Fawziya was in labor for 3 days before she finally died of severe bleeding, and the baby was killed in the process of labor as well. Fawziya would have been in 4th grade, but she was forced to drop out and marry a 24 year old man.

women in uganda are forcibly stripped of their trousers, made to walk home naked. (women in skirts were not accosted.)

the point is: it doesn't matter if you're a successful american yale co-ed, a yemeni child bride, or a woman minding her own business in uganda. on every continent, on every DAY, women are considered to be...

UNEQUAL.

we do not have equal rights. we do not have equal opportunities. we do not have equal safety. female human beings are by default LESS THAN.

and that's unacceptable.

had to share...

2009-09-13T16:45:00.000-07:00

world news at noon

2009-09-10T09:57:00.001-07:00

violence against women in nepal: over 80% of women have been abused by their husbands.

let's make note of that. 80%

---

child sex trafficking: Approximately 797,500 children go missing every year. That works out to roughly 2,185 children a day. And, more than 100,000 children under the age of 18 are currently being trafficked in the United States.

to put that in perspective..."Debbie, a straight-A student who belonged to a close-knit Air Force family living in Phoenix, Ariz., was 15 when she was snatched from her driveway by an acquaintance-friend. Forced into a car, Debbie was bound and taken to an unknown location, held at gunpoint and raped by multiple men. She was then crammed into a small dog kennel and forced to eat dog biscuits. Debbie's captors advertised her services on Craigslist. Those who responded were often married with children, and the money that Debbie "earned" for sex was given to her kidnappers. The gang raping continued. After searching the apartment where Debbie was held captive, police finally found Debbie stuffed in a drawer under a bed. Her harrowing ordeal lasted for 40 days."

---

and finally, women targeted by religious leaders: One in every 33 women who attend worship services regularly has been the target of sexual advances by a religious leader.

clearly: "when you put it with a spiritual leader or moral leader, you've really added a power that we typically don't think about in secular society -- which is that this person speaks for God and interprets God for people. And that really adds a power."

female...THAT'S your pre-existing condition.

i LOVE this!

2009-09-08T07:24:00.000-07:00

women confronting their abusers! look at these two awesome projects- one older, one current.

war zone (1998)

holla back

in both cases, women (primarily) are actively responding to men (primarily) who leer at them, catcall them, and otherwise treat them like objects. i wish every woman could do this every day (i.e. i wish every woman felt safe in responding to harrassment), so that someday, instead of catcalls and street harrassement being a daily occurance, a matter of reflex, they would be activities considered as strange and as ostracized as, i don't know, wearing spandex, or not picking up your dog's business on a walk.

because make no mistake: our culture, which permits and even encourages ('boys will be boys') the treatment of women as nothing more than objects, is the SAME culture which permits and even encourages abuse, rape and the continued real life subjugation of women. women have the RIGHT to live their lives free from abuse. but many do not live with the freedom that right should guarantee.

can you even imagine?

2009-09-08T06:54:00.000-07:00

can you?
can you imagine making the choice that lubna hussein has made?
she faced a criminal trial, and the distinct possibility that she would be flogged (40 lashes, with a plastic whip, which usually leaves permanent scars), finally choosing a month in jail instead of paying a $200 fine...

all because she believes simply that: women in sudan should be allowed to wear trousers.

note: 10 of the 11 other women she was arrested with (for wearing trousers) have already been flogged.

women are NOT equal in our world yet. don't take your pants for granted.

that's what i was gonna say...

2009-08-26T14:16:00.000-07:00

um, wow.

this is why i'm a feminist.

still waiting...

2009-08-26T10:15:00.000-07:00

today is women's equality day!!!

on august 26, 1920, the 19th Amendment, giving women the right to vote, took effect. and in 1923, alice paul introduced the Equal Rights Amendment, which has still not been ratified today.

"sex discrimination should be just as unconstitutional as discrimination on account of race, religion or national origin."- Laura Callow.

tell me again why can't we agree that discrimination, PERIOD, should be unconstitutional???!!!

also- look at this revolutionary photo from Glamour magazine! great analysis from ms. snarker in that post, btw.

"The beauty industry isn’t about making women feel beautiful. It’s about making us feel so horrible about ourselves for not being beautiful that we buy whatever they are selling. Making us hate who we are is a billion-dollar industry."

AND

"Right now, think of three things you don’t like about your body and then three things you love about your body. Those first three came easier, didn’t they? Now f*ck those first three things. Because only those last three things matter. We are as beautiful as we feel. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise."

and finally- more details about chris brown's abuse come out after sentencing. i know that there's probably something to be said against making such a big deal out of this case- all the sympathy rihanna has gotten just because she's a celebrity is sort of a slap in the face to all the women who are abused daily and get ZERO attention or help. but it's also a useful example of just how bad it is for women, and the national fixation is at least bringing some of these skeletons out of america's closet.

"Brown punched Rihanna... numerous times and put her in a head lock, restricting her breathing and causing her to start to lose consciousness. He threatened to beat her and kill her, according to the statement, and he bit her ear and her fingers."

clearly, women are not treated equally in the u.s., or around the world. so today,

say something about equality.

do something about equality.

support equality.

tell your state congresspeople to ratify the ERA!!!

check out http://www.equalrightsamendment.org/ and http://www.eracampaign.net/ for more info. The states that have NOT ratified the Amendment are: Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Louisiana, Mississippi, Missouri, Nevada, North Carolina, Oklahoma, South Carolina, Utah, and Virginia.

recession-proof

2009-08-25T14:53:00.000-07:00

guess which area of our society isn't feeling the pinch due to the recession? in fact, it's flourishing!

domestic abuse.

shelters are seeing increased demand for their services, and the national DV hotline has seen over a 20% jump in calls.

BUT the good news for all you abusers out there is: if you DO get caught, and somehow miraculously ARE convicted...don't worry. you'll just have to spend the equivalent of 2 months picking up some garbage while on parole.

CNN= completely negative news (for women)

2009-08-21T11:27:00.000-07:00

cnn headlines today:

california man murders his ex-wife, "removes" her teeth and fingers, and stuffs her body in a suitcase. (motive? none.)

florida man bludgeons wife in the head with a hammer while she's sleeping, next door to where their 6 month old son is sleeping, with man's parents downstairs. (motive? none.)

and then there's the afghan vote yesterday. in which many women didn't even know they had the right to participate. and those who did feared for their lives.

not a great week to be a woman, no matter where you live. (but sure, we've come a long way baby. *gag*)

are you kidding me.

2009-08-20T13:37:00.001-07:00

well this isn't sexist (or irrelevant) at all.

Yes She Can! 59% Of HuffPost Readers Say Michelle Obama "Absolutely" Has The Right To Wear Shorts (PHOTOS)

give.me.a.break.

speaking of child brides

2009-08-18T10:45:00.001-07:00

70% of girls in bangladesh are forced into marriage while still in their teens.

every.corner.of.the.globe.

"The young brides, lacking education, become the malnourished mothers of undernourished children and little else."

i'll give ya two dollars and a sheep.

2009-08-18T09:42:00.000-07:00

well, last week there was that great piece about child brides...here's more from the guardian re: "the bride price"

in uganda, and across africa, "The practice of bride gifts has been relabelled "bride price", demanded by families and fiercely negotiated. It has reduced young women to commodities and has made families see their daughters as a source of income. Today bride price isn't a bag of potatoes, it's a list of demands for money, animals or clothing made by fathers and older brothers, who might want to throw in requests for new shoes or school fees. The mother gets nothing because she was more or less purchased herself, and the sisters are ignored too as they are all set to be exchanged for commodities when they reach 12 or 13."

the 'commodification of young women'...so much of what we face as women comes back to this basic concept. rape? (women are objects only for the rapist's use) abuse? (women must be controlled, punished, 'shown who's boss') sexism in education/the workplace/society (women aren't as smart/as capable/as valuable/as human as men)...and on and on and on.

in every single corner of the globe, women are treated as less than. so laws are passed (but not enforced) explicitly stating indeed women DO deserve equal treatment. what a cage rattling thought.

how messed up is our world if we have to LEGISLATE equality? from the sufferagists to the civil rights activists to the anti-prop 8 folks- and people in every country following those same paths- people fight valiantly for legal recognition of equal rights. but if legislation is our only avenue, we'll never acheive equality.

i feel like our nation, our globe, needs a new declaration of independence, a new magna carta, (go phillipines!) AFFIRMING the humanity of every living person (female, male, able, disabled, young, old, of every race and ethnicity), and CONDEMNING those who would deny humanity to their fellow people. individual governments can only do so much, and while symbolic gestures certainly carry meaning, they do not change beliefs, or even behaviors. the culture of acceptance of the commodification of women must end. we must protect women, punish abusers, and refuse to accept inequity.

friday screams

2009-08-14T12:21:00.000-07:00

LOTS to scream about this week.

-----
forced child marraige (aka rape)
Highlights:

"World-wide 82 million girls are child brides."

"To be sure, childhood marriage is not an easy problem to address. Some of the causes are poverty, parental desire to prevent sexual relations outside of marriage, fear of rape--which would shame the family and either ostracize or lead to the murder of the victim--lack of educational opportunities for girls, and traditional notions of the primary role of women and girls as wives and mothers. It's perpetuated by religions that aim to keep women subordinate and deeply-rooted cultural norms in which men are encouraged to dominate women--If a wife is a child you can guarantee male control."

*please note- there seem to be a variety of causes listed in the paragraph above...but it's really all just different ways to say the same thing...that's self-evident, i hope.*

"Children like Kidan deserve to have a childhood."

*and, i would add, children like Kidan also deserve a FUTURE THEY CHOOSE FOR THEMSELVES.*

-----
ending the CULTURE of violence against women
Great article. Highlights:

"The last meaningful federal survey took place in 2000, at the end of the Clinton administration. A Department of Justice survey on the "Extent, Nature, and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence" found that nearly 25% of surveyed women said they had been raped and/or physically assaulted by a current or former spouse, partner, or date. That equates to roughly 4.8 million violent attacks against women annually in this country. And many women were the victim of repeat attacks (an average of 6.9 assaults by the same partner).
The study also found that "approximately one-fifth of all rapes, one-quarter of all physical assaults, and one-half of all stalkings" experienced by women will not be reported to the police."

*Key paragraph:
"It's curious how blind we become to our own culture. We can criticize tribal Muslim societies for their abuse of women, yet fail to see how ours sometimes does the same thing. What can we do? We can support organizations like DASH, which provides alternate housing for victims of domestic violence. We can press for public policies that address domestic violence. We can speak out against the culture of violence -- a culture that's strengthened every time a women is treated like an object. "

-----
End the world's two deadliest wars (and save women and girls in the process)
Highlights:

"Together, Sudan and Congo represent two of Africa's largest countries, two of Africa's richest natural resource bases, two of Africa's longest wars, two of the world's deadliest conflicts in the past half century, two of the continent's most predatory governments, and two of the most dangerous places in the world to be a woman or a girl. "

"Rape is employed by these conflicting groups as a tool of war and social control,..."

*who bears the brunt of the conflict, in real life, on the ground, every day? women and girls.*

-----
domestic violence in japan
Highlights:

"The latest data from Japan's national police find a 20 percent jump in the number of women reporting domestic violence. But advocates say there is a long way to go in a country that only criminalized family violence in 2001."

but " Forty percent of people over age 20 don't know there is a domestic violence prevention law and only 14 percent of people over 40 are familiar with it, according to the Gender Agency Bureau, based in Tokyo."

and "A Cabinet Office survey, which was conducted in October-November of last year, found that 33.2 percent of married women have experienced physical and mental abuse from their husbands"

*so, ONE THIRD of women report abuse when surveyed, but a large majority of women, especially over 40, don't even know yet that there is anything they can do to escape their abusers.*

-----
and finally, just a short snippet, a blurb, if you will, to top off alllllll the screaming today:

rape victim blamed for being raped at gunpoint in front of her children.

*Please people, don't ever stay at this mariott again.*

EPIC humanity FAIL.

i'm back, and still pissed.

2009-08-11T09:09:00.000-07:00

after 2 weeks having my brain expanded (grad school was both HARD and TOTALLY INSPIRING), and then a week of serious relaxation and re-charging in my favorite womyn-only environment....i'm back. but not much has changed while i've been gone, unfortch.

BALI, Indonesia (Reuters) - Fifty million women in Asia are at risk of being infected with HIV because of the risky sexual behavior of their husbands or boyfriends, leading health experts said in a report on Tuesday.

no surprise. this is already the reason for the AIDS epidemic in africa- looks like asia isn't far behind.

rape, risky sexual behavior by male partners, and sexual oppression (i.e. no choice to refuse) lead to a lifetime of consequences. the number of women contracting HIV/AIDS is rising quickly, and they are powerless to prevent their own infection.

"don't come crying to me when you get hurt!" - u.s. government

2009-07-17T06:51:00.000-07:00

female veterans are still not receiving adequate care. and we're just talking basic standards of care here. the medical care they can expect to receive once they return from combat isn't anywhere NEAR dependable, high-quality or even available in some cases.

we've heard so many stories about the insult added to (sometimes literal) injury that our veterans are subjected to (hello, walter reed!). but can you imagine being a woman, having already faced overt sexist treatment while enlisted, and likely having feared for your bodily safety at least once, at the hands of your fellow servicemen (i.e. the ultimate betrayal)...and then you finally get home, and you are denied mental health care, or your exams aren't even private, or you have no access to a doctor specializing in women's health at the VA facility.

this is another glaring example of something i've heard a few people mention recently...and it's so........maddening! white, straight, middle/upper class, able-bodied MEN are considered NORMAL. if you posess any characteristics other than that- you're deviant from the norm, and somehow 'odd', 'biased', or 'special' (and not in a good way.)

because, you know:

~it's so HARD to cater to all of female veterans' special needs (whiiinnnneeee)...

~women who don't serve in active combat don't need mental health services. (are you flipping kidding me?)

~judge sotomayor is suspect of being racist, but "the obvious point — that the background and heritage of old white guys influences their decision-making all the time, too — would not have been the politically sound one to make." (i just have to laugh, or i'll cry...)

the whole world is geared toward what has been established as 'normal'. god forbid if you're not normal. don't bother expecting fair treatment. if you demand equality (which, by the way- doesn't mean THE SAME treatment, but rather, the same quality of treatment, or availability of options, or the same access to opportunities) prepare to be labeled a reverse racist, a bitch, or (gasp) hillary clinton.

this does not bode well...

2009-07-09T09:59:00.000-07:00

...for me personally.

Male Nonprofit Executives Earn 27% More Than Female Leaders, Study of Fla. Executives Finds

That pay gap is partially due to the fact that men are more likely to lead large organizations — which offer higher salaries — than are women, according to Margaret Linnane, executive director of the Philanthropy and Nonprofit Leadership Center at Rollins College, in Winter Park, Fla., which conducted the survey.
But men tend to make more money even at smaller organizations, she said.
At the biggest organizations, female CEO’s earned 34.8 percent less than their male counterparts, according to a Guidestar study last year.

hmm, wonder why men are leading all the big organizations?

sweet. sure makes me glad i'm getting my masters, so i can hopefully move up in the ranks some day and make less than my male counterparts!!

c'mon female central florida nonprofit executives- check this study out and raise some Lilly Ledbetter hell!

real life

2009-07-09T07:48:00.000-07:00

real life SVU. new york city bouncer brutalized, murdered and raped boston student.

real life effects of war. 1100 women are raped in the congo every month. more than 16 women (and girls) per day.

the part of that article that made me stop was this: Sexual violence in conflict zones has become so pervasisve that its threat to individual victims as well as entire communities and nations and requires an international response, said Margot Wallstrom, vice president of the European Commission.

ok, i appreciate the sentiment...but does anyone else think that the threat to individuals ALONE should prompt a response? only when it affects the larger community (i.e. not just WOMEN), does this become a 'crisis'.

but any effort to STOP RAPE is a step in the right direction. i want one of these:

troops = war = bad news for women

2009-07-08T12:49:00.000-07:00

two articles today, speaking out about the problem of the continued war in afghanistan. in particular, the problem for women. women in afghanistan already face one of the harshest realities in which to survive. war only intensifies the injustices.

self-immolation is on the rise. in other words, life is so unbearable, the only option that provides relief is suicide.

"peacekeeping" forces do not peace bring. in fact, life in occupied afghanistan is not getting better for women at all.

the implication of a troop surge for afghan women is frightening.

just like that time...

2009-07-07T21:10:00.000-07:00

this reminds me of that story i heard about a woman kidnapping her husband, and holding him prisoner during a violent stand-off with police...

oh wait.

no it doesn't. because i don't think i've ever heard that story. just this one.

the good news is, she got out alive. note, however, that her ex-husband has other pending criminal charges, including threatening, violating a protective order, arson and forgery. she's been dealing with this threat, this fear, for years. this story is what you would find in the dictionary under 'broken system'.

WWII WASPS get their due

2009-07-02T07:29:00.000-07:00

FINALLY.

ok, i admit, this wasn't on my radar until i read the article. but seriously- FINALLY.
these women weren't even recognized by the government who asked them to serve until 30 years later. typical.

rape, murder and infidelity, oh my!

2009-07-01T07:36:00.000-07:00

husbands have property rights in their wives' bodies. and no, we're not talking about husbands in the dark ages. great article linked there about spousal rape- its prevalence and the shameful way it's STILL prosecuted in many states. (the article doesn't even begin to address the issue outside of the u.s.)

boy, that protective order really worked, huh? the murdered woman did everything right. but she's still dead.
i wish i could personally look women in the eye and really make them hear and believe me: he DOESN'T love you, he WON'T stop hurting you, and you should NOT, under ANY circumstances, take your abuser back.

jeez, sanford just can't shut up. it would be funny if it wasn't so disgusting and (of course) degrading to his wife. i hope she pitches him.

one more for the tally

2009-06-30T21:46:00.000-07:00

just happened to catch this gem tonight, while it's still june-

---------

A Cedar Rapids man is charged with sexually abusing a 4-year-old girl at his apartment.

Police say Daryl Bentley is charged with second-degree sexual abuse. He is accused of abusing the girl at about 5:30 a.m. on June 17.

Police spokeswoman Sgt. Christy Hamblin says the child did not live with Bentley.

Bentley is the nephew of Roger Bentley, who is serving a life sentence for the 2005 kidnapping and murder of 10-year-old Jetseta Gage, and James Bentley, who is serving a 100-year federal prison sentence for taking pornographic pictures of Gage and a 1-year-old girl in 2003.

James Bentley also is serving a 25-year sentence for sexually abusing Gage.

-------

lest anyone thing that abuse of women and girls isn't a LEARNED behavior.

summer in iowa

2009-06-30T07:48:00.001-07:00

summer is here, and it's gorgeous in iowa.
but it's still dangerous.

des moines man chokes his wife till she loses consciousness then tries to hit her with a car.

strawberry point man kidnaps and sexually assaults a 16-year old in a remote location.

sioux city man climbs in a 3-year old's bedroom window in the early hours of the morning, sexually assaults, and murders her, while her 9-year old brother pretends to be asleep in the next bed, for fear of being hurt himself. (he later helped identify the killer.)

iowa city police state 12 rapes have been reported thus far in 2009. now, going by conservative estimates of the number of rapes that are actually reported (40%), we can guess that there have actually been more like 30 rapes... in little iowa city, IA... in the past 6 months... conservatively.
that's more than one woman a week.

these headlines were just from June 2009. multiply this times 12 months, times 50 states, times 7 continents. (ok, maybe 6). rape and sexual assault are constant threats to women and girls the world over. it's not a joke, and it's not going away.

anywhere you go, i'll follow you down

2009-06-27T09:37:00.001-07:00

this woman was raped, and escaped, twice. this is about a dozen blocks from where i grew up.

every day, in every city and town. girls, women, mothers, daughters, sisters. we are all at risk.

rape is all around us.

2009-06-25T07:34:00.000-07:00

hilarious.

when i heard about sanford's press conference yesterday, a few thoughts flashed in rapid succession through my brain:

1. they really are ALL doing it.
2. so what's the big deal- why are we so surprised every time we hear someone confess?
3. family values my a**, sir.

apartheid?

2009-06-18T12:24:00.000-07:00

one in four men in south africa admit to rape. that's just the ones who ADMIT it.

apartheid: inhumane acts of a character similar to other crimes against humanity "committed in the context of an institutionalized regime of systematic oppression and domination by one racial group over any other racial group or groups and committed with the intention of maintaining that regime."

Substitute "gender" for "racial" in the above definition, and you've pretty much got it.
sexism is institutionalized.
rape is about domination.
rape is the tool that those with power use to maintain their power.

this isn't exaggeration, it's reality.

feminists in iran

2009-06-18T07:22:00.001-07:00

iranian women are protesting side-by-side with the men, calling for justice. their calls, however, echo even louder in my ears, because while there are certainly general rights for all people that are of importance to all the protesters... at least the men don't have to fear forced marraiges, strictly enforced "modesty" regulations, caps on the numbers of them who can attend university, and unemployment based on their gender. mousavi is most certainly the lesser of two evils in this case, and women's lives will not transform over night if he were in power, but liberty will never come under ahmadinejad's zealously patriarchal thumb.

these women inspire me.

CPC's

2009-06-17T20:27:00.000-07:00

"crisis pregnancy centers" purporting to talk to scared young women about their "options" just get on my nerves.

not only do they not actually TALK to women honestly about all their options, they also WITHHOLD proven options for reducing unintended pregnancies: birth control and condoms. these CPC's are the worst example of misrepresentation and misleading advertising. many are not medically licensed in any way, but make it seem as if they're giving medical advice/information.

organizations like this one: http://www.togetherforyouth.net/ are the ones really making a measurable impact in reducing unintended and teen pregnancies. and they're doing it *comprehensively*. their message includes ALL options- abstinence (being the ONLY fail safe method of pregnancy and std prevention), birth control, condoms, and the full spectrum of women's health resources.

in my community, there are two organizations that call themselves CPC's, but which do NOT provide full, accurate information about women's rights and options: birthright, and alternatives. women should know what to expect when going to these centers for help. if you share their worldviews, by all means, go to them. (truly!) my point is simply that women should know what to expect.

i encourage anyone who has questions, or concerns about their reproductive health to visit planned parenthood. when i was young, nervous and didn't know who to turn to, they were warm, welcoming, informative and very very helpful. frankly, i credit the dedicated staff of my local planned parenthood in large part for my life as it is today. without them, i could have gotten pregnant during my young, short marriage, and my life would have been unrecognizable from today.

this is not a very p.c. or popular thing for women to say (still!), but i'm going to say it:

i love my life today, and i'm so glad i didn't get pregnant at a young age.

ALL women should know and have access to the OPTIONS to control their own lives. men get to.

*edited to add: spot-on analysis of the dangers of the virginity movement and especially all the funding that was funneled to it during the previous administration.

~~~~~

and on another note:
"certain rights, in certain instances, by certain agencies..." ~ Rep. Tammy Baldwin being very frank on the Rachel Maddow show tonight, re: President Obama's executive order to extend some benefits to same-sex partners of federal employees.

doesn't sound to me much like "the Blessings of Liberty"
OR
"unalienable rights- life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness"

2009-06-15T09:45:00.000-07:00

100 more rape kits untested, this time in chicago.

wife = toaster

2009-06-04T07:16:00.000-07:00

how else would you describe this story? the plain fact is that this man considers his wife (and i would imagine, most women), to be his personal possession. and not even a valuable possession...he wouldn't treat his big screen so callously. or his pool table. or his car. nah, she's more like a toaster- useful, but no reason to be gentle with her. just a tool for getting what you want (i.e. breakfast. or, in this case, a midnight snack.)

wait- actually, HE's the tool.

winger

2009-06-02T09:01:00.000-07:00

really? REALLY?

Judge Sonya Sotomayor's menstrual cycle, language (spanish = "illegal alien"), and of course race, are all totally NON SEXIST and NON RACIST reasons why she should not be the next supreme court justice, right?

thanks for the WHAAAA? moment today, Mr. G. Gordon Libby.

so why would this old nixon-era-convicted-felon care if the next surpreme court justice were a latina woman, as long as she's qualified? why would anyone care? oh that's right- because it means that the POWER will all of a sudden be shared with someone who is not a part of the good ol' boys club. and that, my friends, is the biggest threat of all.

thanks @sarahwarn for the tip on your twitter conversation w/ the esteemed Mr. Libby. keep it up.

x Infinity

2009-06-02T07:20:00.000-07:00

i just don't understand (and yet, i do) how stories like this don't cause people to absolutely riot in the streets.

"She was 23 the day in 1994 he beat her senseless, leaving her with back, neck and hand injuries — bone spurs, pinched nerves, osteoarthritis — that still require surgeries. He told Thompson he would kill her, bury her in the back yard and tell their daughters she had run away. He slapped her so hard that a ring on his right hand flew off and dented the wall.The abuse continued for more than three hours. At his trial, she testified the pain was so severe when he squeezed her ears with pliers that she pleaded for him to kill her. Instead, he held her at gunpoint for another 15 hours before allowing her to go to a hospital.
On Friday he was released [from prison], and she began waiting for him to make good on his promise to kill her and her daughters. Price walked out of a federal prison in South Carolina after serving 4½ years of a five-year sentence for sending the [death threat] letter, which began with the words, "Dear Slut."

and stories like this could be told in a hundred newspapers across the country every day (and thousands around the world, especially in areas where women have no legal protections whatsoever). will there ever be a time when women don't live in fear of abuse?

a simple equation

2009-06-02T07:03:00.000-07:00

BEREGA, Tanzania — A handwritten ledger at the hospital tells a grim story. For the month of January, 17 of the 31 minor surgical procedures here were done to repair the results of “incomplete abortions.” A few may have been miscarriages, but most were botched operations by untrained, clumsy hands.
Abortion is illegal in Tanzania (except to save the mother’s life or health), so women and girls turn to amateurs, who may dose them with herbs or other concoctions, pummel their bellies or insert objects vaginally. Infections, bleeding and punctures of the uterus or bowel can result, and can be fatal. Doctors treating women after these bungled attempts sometimes have no choice but to remove the uterus.
Pregnancy and childbirth are among the greatest dangers that women face in Africa, which has the world’s highest rates of maternal mortality — at least 100 times those in developed countries. Abortion accounts for a significant part of the death toll.
In most countries the rates of abortion, whether legal or illegal — and abortion-related deaths — tend to decrease when the use of birth control increases. But only about a quarter of Tanzanians use contraception. In South Africa, the rate of contraception use is 60 percent, and in Kenya 39 percent. Both have lower rates of maternal mortality than does Tanzania.

to me, this is the key point in any discussion of reproductive rights:
anti-reproductive rights activists should be the most STALWART birth control, safe sex and family planning supporters. period. end of story. preventing unwanted pregnancies = preventing abortion.

you don't cure an infection by addressing only the symptoms. you attack the CAUSE of the infection in order to make the symptons disappear. the "bad kind" of abortion is primarily the symptom of unwanted pregnancies. so STOP THEM. educate women, provide the resources they need, and STOP RAPE NOW.

life ain't fair

2009-06-01T13:15:00.000-07:00

Customers rank women and minority doctors, salespeople and service workers lower than their white male counterparts, even when the customer's interactions with the doctors, sales people or service workers are identical.

key excerpt:
In a related experiment involving bookshop employees, volunteers were shown two videotaped interactions between a customer and a sales clerk and were told to imagine they were customers and rate the shop's service. Some were shown a white male sales clerk, while others were shown a black male clerk or a white female clerk. All the clerks were actors -- and everything else in the videos was identical, down to the script. (emphasis mine)
Those shown the white male clerk rated the service provided 19 percent higher than volunteers shown the woman or the black man. They also rated stores with white male clerks as being cleaner. (emphasis mine)

which is why it's so important to have boards, committees, groups, schools, organizations, city councils, governments and LIVES that reflect the diversity of the world we live in. because if we are left to our own devices, we prove time and again that we are biased, prejudiced, racist, sexist and incapable of systematically treating people fairly. it is only upon closer and sustained examination of our actions and decisions, through the lens of diversity, that we begin to see the inherent fallibility of those actions and decisions. and when we recognize what we're doing, we then have the choice, the opportunity, to change. but if we are never forced, (by simple association), to consider the effect our actions and decisions have on people different from ourselves, then we continue in oblivion.

in other words: until whites and blacks and latinos and arabs, and women and men, and gays and straights, and old and young KNOW one another, respect one another on a personal level and work together across dividing lines- and until ALL those descriptors can be used to accurately describe the governments and boards who wield the power in our communities and across the nation: the inequalities for blacks, latinos, arabs, women, gays, old and young will persist, and will in fact be perpetuated through the governments and boards which hold the power. if our bodies of power do not accurately reflect our communities (which they currently most often do NOT), then the decisions that are made, affecting the entire diverse community, will be exactly like those customer surveys.

it's about more than satisfaction surveys, though. this affects real lives. every day. it's why black men are disproportionately represented in prisons in Iowa. and it's why women are raped but rapists are not hunted down like their victims were. and it's why LGBT men and women aren't given equal protection under the law. and it's why i have missed out on career opportunities.

human beings are unfair to one another. life ain't fair, right? but i choose to stand on the side with all those who say, Imagine.

survival

2009-06-01T09:30:00.000-07:00

Patti Rosenfelder survived rape and sexual assault 30 years ago, and wants to tell her story. I think it's a story everyone should hear.

Lolita Windsor's son stabbed her repeatedly and held her captive, over a period of hours.

Darfuri women live in fear, even after they have fled their war-ravaged homeland in Sudan. The refugee camps are almost as bad as the conflict zone, where a simple trip to gather firewood often results in attack and rape.

Darfur. The Congo. The United States of America.
Not so very different from one another, for women.
We live under the constant threat of violence, rape and the knowledge that domestic violence and sexual assault are stopped or punished in only a fraction of the cases. The war on women is real, and every woman who has ever walked across a parking lot holding her keys the way Patti Rosenfelder does knows it.

PWB

2009-05-21T20:53:00.001-07:00

DWB = driving while black. it's not a positive connotation.

but this righteous lady (literally), Alysa Stanton, is going to be PREACHING while black... and female... and as of this weekend- an ordained rabbi! very cool. (the first female rabbi was ordained in the u.s. in 1974.)

but of course, the old guard is none too pleased about it. (well, frankly, i don't think they've been pleased since 1974.)

"My general feeling, as a rabbi, is that there is a great deal of room for everyone to have spiritual fulfillment in Judaism but the public role of a rabbi is only for certain people and that excludes women," Orthodox Rabbi Gil Student of New York City told ABCNews.com. "That's based on tradition and enshrined in law."

As for race, Student said that neither he nor the Orthodox Jewish community finds any problem with African-American Jews. "There is no such thing as skin color in Judaism, it doesn't exist," Student said.

why is race invisible, but gender is a problem? a person has no control over either. neither one defines a person's morality, intellect, or character.
so why? why would it not matter if this new rabbi was a black MAN, but somehow the fact that it's a black WOMAN creates controversy?

you guessed it. because deep down, it's because women are still viewed as inferior. the orthodox rabbi flat out said in the article that the correct role for women is only to raise the family.

honestly, every time i hear that kind of sentiment i want to throw up a little bit. not because i don't respect the work of raising a family. but because 1. what about women who have no desire to raise a family? like, you know, ME? so what are we, chopped liver? (i don't think i want to know mr. rabbi's answer to that.) and 2. it's a cop-out. it completely ignores the other parent's responsibility. it's counterintuitive to the whole conservative movement's recent apoplectic fit about "one man and one woman is the only proper way to raise a family". uh...apparently not. apparently, it's the woman's responsibility, period. the man would be much too busy LEADING.

and i love how he justifies the arbitrary exclusion of women by saying it's "enshrined in law". because a. laws are ALWAYS moral and stand the test of time, don't they? (ahem.) and b. what about 'thou shalt have no other gods before me'? (enshrine: to cherish as sacred.) unless i'm misunderstanding that commandment, it's god, not the law, that should ultimately be honored. so if a law is immoral, or just flat out wrong, it should be changed. period.

so anyway- i just wanted to toot Alysa's horn a little bit. kudos!
and also tell rabbi student to bugger off.

shero alert

2009-05-18T10:30:00.001-07:00

i almost started writing all about one of my "sheros", eve ensler. i do admire her courage, her persistence and her hard, hard work.

but then i realized the real sheros of this story are the congolese women who are surviving, and those who haven't survived.

War on Women in Congo

"I was in Bosnia during the war in 1994 when it was discovered there were rape camps where white women were being raped. Within two years there was adequate intervention. Yet, in Congo, femicide has continued for 12 years. Why?"

"What is happening in Congo is the most brutal and rampant violence toward women in the world. If it continues to go unchecked, if there continues to be complete impunity, it sets a precedent, it expands the boundaries of what is permissible to do to women's bodies..."

"...in Eastern Congo, 1,100 women a month are raped, according to the United Nations' most recent report."

the rape of a nation

2009-05-14T18:12:00.000-07:00

nation of women, that is. today, and every day.

¹ep·i·dem·ic
Pronunciation:: \ˌe-pə-ˈde-mik\
Function:: adjective
Etymology:: French épidémique, from Middle French, from epidemie, noun, epidemic, from Late Latin epidemia, from Greekepidēmia visit, epidemic, from epidēmos visiting, epidemic, from epi- + dēmos people — more at demagogue
Date:: 1603

1: affecting or tending to affect a disproportionately large number of individuals within a population, community, or region at the same time epidemic>

two parents sexually abuse & rape adopted daughter, separately and unbeknownst to one another.

rape is used worldwide as a weapon of war. i know that's a cliche by know- but imagine being born (through no fault of your own) as a newborn baby girl...in the congo. not so cliche now.

rape isn't enough- this guy decided to beat her in the head with a HAMMER as well.

14- year- old girl raped. there are no other details really...there don't need to be. this girls life is changed forever.

an army sergeant forced a women into his car and raped her in front of a restaurant in bel air. she tried to bang on the window, but no one heard. this we'll defend?

not just rape- rape of a THIRTEEN year old, MENTALLY HANDICAPPED girl...ON TAPE. but women aren't systematically abused. just individually abused- over and over and over.

child rape is the trifecta today- 14, 13, and now 10.

former minister. rape of four prostitutes. at knife-point. a butcher knife.

false rape allegations. yikes- definitely not good. murder, however- ALSO not really a good option. and he didn't just murder his girlfriend (the accuser), but also her sister. he stabbed his girlfriend in the back, and her sister, "Sabrina was stabbed 35 times, but Mr Ali said he only remembered stabbing her twice."

here's the thing. it doesn't matter what you do. take back the night. a vagina monologue. donate to a women's foundation. mentor a young man and teach him that violence against women is unacceptable. volunteer for a rape crisis line.

do SOMETHING. do it. NOW. women are being raped, every minute.

2009-05-05T09:52:00.000-07:00

Women Pay the Price for Health Insurance
key points from this illuminating story:
- Insurance companies don't want to pay for the high cost events like childbirth
- Women are more likely to get annual check ups & visit the doctor if ill
- Women pay up to 39 percent more than men for similar individual policies, even when maternity benefits are excluded.

Makes me think of that saying people laugh about- but it's SO true:
If men could get pregnant, 'family planning' would be a sacrament.

I guess we could also say: If men were having babies, or if they were brought up in a world where going to the doctor wasn't akin to admitting a weakness (see also: crying), health insurance rates would be EQUAL for equally healthy people, regardless of gender.

highlights & lowlights

2009-05-01T12:58:00.001-07:00

a couple of highlights for today:

8-year-old saudi arabian girl is FINALLY granted her divorce from 50-year-old husband!!! (but no one knows how many other girls are still trapped in abusive prisons, passed off as "relationships", in saudi arabia and elsewhere.)

britain FINALLY appoints a female poet laureate. it only took 341 years for a woman to produce poetry as good as the men. (<>acid attacks for attending school. group home schooling has sprung up as an option for those to afraid to walk down the street. let me repeat that: women and girls are afraid to walk down the street to attend school.

Final score: marching band 2, thugs 0.

2009-05-01T07:49:00.000-07:00

one of the lucky ones:

Girl beats off muggers with marching band baton. 'Moral to this story is don't mess with the marching band girls,' official says.

The real moral is- ALWAYS fight back.

dsm or l.a.?

2009-04-30T18:53:00.000-07:00

which one do you think is the story datelined in des moines, IA, and which one is from los angeles? (click the links to find out)

DNA leads to suspect in 1970's serial killings.

A man who police believe raped and murdered dozens of women decades ago was arrested by cold case investigators this month after a computer matched his DNA to evidence from two killings in the 1970s. John Floyd Thomas Jr., 72, may have begun his killings as far back as 1955 and he could be one of the worst serial killers in United States history, according to Chief William Bratton. They suspect he killed at least 30 women and raped many more.

Police Link Rapes, Burglaries

Police are searching for a man they believe is responsible for up to five home burglaries in which two young women were raped and six others were assaulted. The suspect entered the home and went into a bedroom where a 24-year-old man and woman were sleeping. The suspect threatened the two with a knife, and then held the man at bay with the knife while he raped the woman, Police Lt. Jeff Miller said. The description and nature of the crimes are similar to four others that have been committed since December, Miller said: Dec 28, An 18-year-old woman was raped and her mother assaulted; Feb 13, A 19-year-old woman was assaulted; Feb. 22, A 24-year-old woman was assaulted; April 13, A 21-year-old woman and a 23-year-old man were assaulted. In this case, the two were able to fight off the suspect.

1360

2009-04-30T12:13:00.000-07:00

100 days down, 1,360 to go.

already, there have been a variety of important and meaningful strides by the obama administration to right wrongs and improve the lives of women and girls. because (not to belabour the point, but): the lives of women and girls are NOT equally safe, prosperous or healthy as the lives of men. STILL.

a few of the (exciting!) highlights:

*repeal of the global gag rule = clinics around the world receiving funding from the u.s. can once again provide information about and services related to family planning. which gives women more choices with regard to how many children they bear. which means they may have the opportunity to do something other than bear 10 unwanted children and live a life of poverty. a novel idea.

*lilly ledbetter fair pay act = anyone (*not just women, it should be noted*) who suspects wage discrimination has more time to bring suit against their employer. no-brainer. (see below for remaining questions.)

*white house council on women and girls = the promise of real, sustained attention to issues of health, violence against women, fair pay, etc. etc. etc. (see below for remaining questions.)

but questions remain:

*the lilly ledbetter act isn't going to solve the actual problem of unequal pay for equal work. the Paycheck Fairness Act will directly address the underlying issue of wage discrimination. this bill still needs to be passed. it includes training, technical assistance and incentives for employers to be(come) fair.

*the white house council has no paid staff, nor is the executive director (tina tchen) a cabinet-level position. it remains to be seen how active the council will be (no set meeting dates yet) and how influential it may become. will this be an active, change-making council, or an empty promise?

*the economic turmoil will likely have an immediate and severe effect on women. stimulus/recovery plans MUST address the effect of the economy on women explicitly, or they will implicitly leave them out completely. women still earn only 78 cents to a man's dollar. and the gap is MUCH wider for women of color (african-american earning 69 cents on the dollar, and latinas only 59 cents!) (!!!)

*what will be done about violence against women? especially in the u.s. military! one in three women in the military will be sexually assaulted during their tour of duty. ONE IN THREE.

some issues are so apparent, so prevalent and so apalling, i am routinely left speechless when i see the reality of the way women still have to fight tooth and nail, every day, to simply live a safe life, with equal rights and choices equal to those men enjoy. but it IS real, and the more people SEE the inequities that face every woman, every day...the more i hope they will speak up and demand change.

RIP Bea

2009-04-27T08:34:00.000-07:00

not only was bea arthur one of the funniest women on the planet (in my opinion- but then i love deep dark sarcasm), she was also a feminist, and gave us some of the most impressive, thought-provoking characters in american popular culture. i admire her wit, her conviction, and her stamina. RIP bea.

traffic

2009-04-21T19:16:00.000-07:00

not a lot of time to blog lately, but i've been seeing a ton of headlines recently about trafficking.

Sex trafficking is a modern-day form of slavery in which a commercial sex act is induced by force, fraud, or coercion, or in which the person induced to perform such an act is under the age of 18 years.

and it's everywhere.

the ivory coast, west africa

and those stories are all from april 2009.

from the Independent Student Weekly of the Harvard Business School:

"Trafficking is not a simple issue. It is a problem created by a complex stew of social, cultural, economic and political factors and, as would fit the chemistry of the problem, there is no one person, organization or economic sector that can handle the issue on its own."

no, trafficking isn't simple. but frankly, i think the reason that sex trafficking is so prevalent is pretty clear. according to the state department, 70% of trafficking victims are women and girls.

the reason is because, the world over, women and girls are seen as valuable based solely on their sexuality. and because of that, their lives are forfeit. sex trafficking has been called 21st century slavery, and the systematic abuse of women and girls across the globe certainly meets the main requirements to be considered slavery: "Slavery is a form of forced labor in which people are considered to be, or treated as, the property of others."

in other words, women and girls are property, because of the price they fetch. for that reason only. because they can be bought and sold, they are. supply and demand.

two grassroots organizations working to combat sex trafficking and help victims and survivors- you should shop, and give your $1.

The Emancipation Network

The Buck Up Campaign

@mrskutcher thanks for posting the BuckUp link- the inspiration for this post.

lightbulb moment

2009-04-12T19:29:00.000-07:00

why is this such a rare opinion? because admitting that men are the ones who should be criminalized for prostitution is admitting that men are the reason prostitution exists, and admitting that men are the reason prostitution exists is admitting that our whole society is built on prostitution, where women sell their bodies, their minds, their hearts and their souls as the last resort for survival.

awareness

2009-04-12T08:15:00.001-07:00

president obama declared april sexual assault awareness month. here are a few timely items intended to increase awareness:

more reporting about the high sexual assault/rape statistics in the u.s. military. now, correct me if i'm wrong- but isn't the military the most highly restrictive, regimented, rules-based, you-don't-scratch-your-you-know-what-unless-you're-told environment we have in the u.s.? so, if that's true, my opinion is that the only way military rape can be so prevalent is if it's expressly encouraged. whether it's encouraged through "male comradarie", or whether it's encouraged through the obvious difficulty a victim knows they will have to endure if they report their assult...either way- there is nothing left to chance, or to personal interpretation in the military. you do what you're told, and only what you're told, period. so somehow, people are being told sexual assault is ok.

update on a story we previously read- a saudi judge repeats his ruling that an 8-year old girl married off to a 47-year old man has no grounds for divorce. there just isn't much more to say about that.

oh, haven't you seen the trailers for that new seth rogan movie Observe & Report!?!? It looks so funny!

except the part where the girl he takes home passes out while they're having sex and he basically just shrugs and keeps on keepin' on.

nice.

date rape is HILARIOUS.

afghan cleric says the world's outcry against his law is simply meddling. silly foreigners- demanding sex from your wife every 4 days unless she is ill (i can't wait to see how many illnesses are invented after this law is passed, though- women are smarter than this guy thinks!) is a man's fundamental right, and any attempt by a wife to assert her own opinion on the subject is (will be) illegal.

you know how they say chocolate is an aphrodesiac? rapists turn even the most benign activities into cause for women to fear. this poor girl never dreamed, working in a chocolate shop at niagara falls, that she'd have any possible reason to worry about sexual assault. but that ingenious 17 year old boy found a way to make it happen. brilliant. always keep 'em guessing, right guys?

another place you wouldn't think you'd need to worry, ladies? high school. but you'd be wrong.

and finally- not related to sexual assault, but generally related to to the pervasive and systematic repression and just-plain-ignoring-of-anything-related-to-women -that-does-not equal-sexiness:

doctors are failing to diagnose thousands of women and girls with aspergers syndrome, a form of autism, because until now, the prevailing view of the way this syndrome presents symptomatically is based solely on boys' presentation.

well imagine that. something in our society is geared solely toward men, or oriented only toward the way it will affect men, with no regard for the affect on or relation to women? shocking.

domestic violence gets a famous face

2009-04-02T07:05:00.000-07:00

this ad gave me chills. (warning, scenes of violence depicted)

keira knightly takes a step to raise awareness, and i appreciate it.